What to do to actually love yourself
People always say,
“You need to love yourself first.”
But no one really teaches you how to do that...especially after heartbreak.
When I was healing from my divorce, I kept wondering HOW was I supposed to heal? I didn't need vague advice...
I needed something real.
Here are the 7 things I did to learn how to actually love myself:
Practice stillness
I started giving myself 15-30 minutes every morning to try to listen to what my heart and body needed. It was hard at first, but the practice became easier as I went along and now I cherish my mornings with myself.
Accept your whole self
I took a full look at myself, even the parts I used to try to hide. I looked at them unflinchingly and really saw myself for who I was. Then I practiced embracing myself as I was.
Forgive your past
I released myself from the guilt and shame I’d been dragging around. Guilt for making the 'wrong' decisions. Shame for being made a fool of. I let it go. It wasn't serving me.
Honor your needs
I started asking, What do I need today? and actually gave myself that. Sometimes the answer was love. Sometimes the answer was rest. Sometimes it was fun. Honoring your needs is a step towards practicing integrity for yourself.
Move with love
Exercise became a way for me to express love for my body. I wasn't punishing myself, instead I was reminding myself that I’m worthy of care and strength.
Speak kindly to yourself
I decided to stop criticizing myself for everything and instead speak to myself with love, like I would a friend. Suddenly being on my own side made such a difference in my daily outlook.
Journal your feelings
Write out and process the emotions and thoughts you have. Using journal prompts helps to guide you to make progress towards healing.
If this resonates, come join me in my FREE masterclass on healing from divorce on July 30th.
I’ll be teaching exactly how to rebuild your life… starting with learning to love yourself.
DM me “HEAL” and I’ll send you the link!
#healingjourney #selflove #howtoloveyourself #heartbreak #progressoverperfection
Self-love is a vital foundation for emotional well-being and healing, particularly after experiencing heartbreak or major life changes like divorce. The article highlights essential steps such as practicing stillness and journaling your feelings, which help deepen self-awareness and emotional processing. Additionally, the importance of forgiving your past and accepting your whole self cannot be overstated; these practices allow you to release negative emotions such as guilt and shame, fostering inner peace. Honoring your needs is an often overlooked step in self-love. Asking yourself "What do I need today?" encourages mindfulness and reinforces personal integrity by responding authentically to your emotional, physical, and mental needs. Moving with love—engaging in physical activity as a means of nurturing your body—transforms exercise from a punitive act into a loving one, promoting body positivity and self-respect. Another key element is speaking kindly to yourself. Self-criticism undermines confidence, while gentle, compassionate self-talk boosts motivation and improves mental outlook. This aligns with many therapeutic practices that emphasize the power of positive internal dialogue. Journaling is an effective tool to explore and process complex feelings. Using prompts can guide this emotional exploration, making it structured and purposeful. Together, these seven steps create a comprehensive approach to rebuilding self-love after emotional trauma. In addition to these practical steps, engaging in supportive communities or masterclasses—like the offered free masterclass on healing from divorce—can offer further guidance, accountability, and encouragement during the healing journey. Finally, embracing progress over perfection allows for a compassionate, non-judgmental approach to personal growth, affirming that healing and self-love are ongoing processes rather than quick fixes.