I’ve been “fake” loving myself.
I get my nails done, toes done, hair is did, shopping sprees, cute coffee shops, tanning membership, going out, everything to physically look and feel good.
But what have I been doing to mentally feel good or emotionally keep up with my busy lifestyle?? Nothing.
That changed today. I’m one week sober and I attended church this morning for the first time in months. Maybe a year. And guess what??? It was all FREE.
Everything that Ive done for “self love” is just so I can look good. And, sure, it definitely helps me stay motivated and looking “the part” of my career of doing beauty.
I, personally, think if I want to advertise hair, nails, makeup, and skin, I need to keep up with my own hair, nails, makeup, and skin. That’s just me though.
However, even though I may “look” good, waking up hungover after a night, I don’t remember anything past nine o’clock, doesn’t “feel” good. It’s actually really, super duper UGLY. Waking up feeling embarrassed and ashamed of what I did, or being worried I did something that reflects poorly of my image, isn’t cute at all. I don’t like that girl.
And there is absolutely nothing I love more than a ✨REBRAND! ✨
Since I turned 21 I’ve been party central. And, no, I’m not talking about going out every weekend with the girls.
I’m talking about going out on weeknights, by myself, blacking out, crying. I mean, I was a mess.
I technically am still a mess, but, a mess with structure.
I warned you of that in my introduction post so that’s old news.
I don’t think I’ll ever be straight and narrow, and I’m totally okay with that. I just want to have a good sense of self love again.
The kind where I am so confident in my ability to fill my own cup, I couldn’t care less if people were watching me do it.
I want to provide myself a safe space to lean into my soft girl era. I want to be THAT B**CH. okay?
I’m in a wedding on Saturday and the rehearsal dinner is Friday. I pray for sobriety throughout this weekend. I would be so proud of myself and it would really boost my confidence. But, I take it one day at a time. We will cross that bridge when we get there, right?
Self love is more than just looking good on the outside; it’s about nurturing your mind and spirit as well. Many of us often fall into the trap of equating self-care with external beauty routines — manicures, hair treatments, shopping — but true self love involves mental and emotional healing. Sobriety can play a powerful role in this transformation by providing clarity and allowing us to confront our feelings without numbing them. Attending community spaces like church or support groups often offers free and calming environments where one can engage in reflection and find a sense of belonging. These experiences help build inner strength and a safe space to grow your “soft girl era,” a time to honor vulnerability and compassion toward yourself. Self-love means filling your own cup first — gaining confidence in your ability to care for yourself, regardless of external validation. It’s about embracing imperfections, learning from past struggles such as unhealthy partying habits, and committing to healthier choices one day at a time. Rebranding yourself emotionally is just as important as physical transformations because it aligns your outer image with your inner truth. Remember, self-love is an ongoing journey, not a destination. Taking steps toward emotional wellness by seeking sobriety or spiritual connection can boost your confidence and create sustainable happiness. And it’s okay to be perfectly imperfect during this process — loving yourself authentically is the ultimate glow-up.
