This Year Taught Me Trust Isn’t Calm
This Year Taught Me Trust Isn’t Calm It’s Committed
As this year comes to a close, I’m realizing how much I misunderstood trust. I thought trusting God meant my thoughts were supposed to quiet down, that once I handed something over, my mind should stop revisiting it and my emotions should settle neatly into peace. But this year taught me something far more honest.
Scripture does not say that casting my burden on the Lord would make it disappear. It says He would sustain me. Sustaining means there was still weight. It means the situation did not resolve on my timeline. It means the struggle lingered long enough to require God’s strength beneath it. And that truth feels especially real as I look back over these months.
David wrote those words while surrounded by pain, betrayal, and fear. His thoughts did not stop. His distress did not instantly lift. What changed was not the presence of trouble but the presence of God carrying him through it. That reframes this entire year for me. There were moments I kept thinking about what hurt, moments I questioned why my heart had not caught up with my faith yet. But that did not mean I failed to trust God. It meant I was human and still showing up.
Trust, I’ve learned, is not proven by silence in my thoughts. It is proven by where I placed the weight when those thoughts returned. Again and again, I brought the same thing back to God, sometimes with confidence, sometimes with tears, sometimes exhausted and tired of being strong. And still, He sustained me.
As I step into a new year, I am not demanding mental perfection from myself anymore. I am learning to trust without shame, to rest without pretending, and to place the weight back on God as many times as it takes. If this year taught me anything, it is that God is not intimidated by my returning thoughts or my lingering sadness. He meets me there and holds me steady, and that is enough.
Dee Bloomingmoore 🌺