Some of the Hardest Work I've Done Has Been on My Own Heart
I used to think healing meant getting to a place where certain things simply wouldn't hurt anymore.
Now I understand it differently.
Some things still hurt. Some memories still disappoint me. Some relationships didn't become what I hoped they would become. And there are things I've forgiven that I would never willingly experience again.
The heart work has been learning what to do with all of that.
I've had to ask myself whether I was actually healing or simply becoming better at avoiding what hurt me.
Whether I had forgiven or just stopped talking about it.
Whether I was protecting my heart or becoming so guarded that nobody could reach it.
And whether some of my reactions belonged to what was happening in front of me or to something that happened years ago.
Those questions haven't always been comfortable.
But they've helped me understand that healing isn't about becoming unaffected.
It's about becoming more aware.
I can acknowledge that something hurt me without allowing it to determine how I love everyone who comes after it.
I can forgive someone without pretending their choices were okay.
I can have compassion and still have boundaries.
I can recognize my own mistakes without making shame my identity.
And I can admit that sometimes I'm the one who needs to grow.
That's the part of heart work we don't always talk about.
Eventually, healing asks me to stop looking only at what other people did and start paying attention to what their actions produced in me.
The fear.
The defensiveness.
The resentment.
The need to prove myself.
The difficulty trusting.
The habit of expecting disappointment before anything has even happened.
I'm learning to bring those parts of myself to God instead of pretending they aren't there.
Because I don't want my heart to become hard simply because life has been hard.
I want to heal without losing my softness.
Forgive without losing my wisdom.
Love without losing myself.
And grow without pretending I was never wounded.
That's heart work.
And I'm still doing it.
What has healing taught you about your own heart?
Dee Bloomingmoore 🌺
Healing is rarely a straight path to feeling okay all the time. From my own experience, the hardest work on my heart has come not from avoiding pain, but facing it head-on and learning to hold space for every emotion that surfaces. This is what I’ve come to call heart work—an ongoing practice of awareness, forgiveness, and personal growth. One thing I’ve realized is that healing doesn't mean erasing old wounds or pretending they never happened. Instead, it’s about recognizing how past hurts shape my responses today and being honest with myself about what still affects me. This clarity creates room for compassion and boundaries to coexist, which can be challenging but ultimately frees me from being stuck in hurt. I’ve also found that forgiveness is not about excusing harmful actions, but about releasing their hold on me so I can love and trust again without fear or defensiveness. Bringing those vulnerable parts of myself to a higher power or support system helps me cultivate softness rather than hardening my heart against future pain. In practical terms, heart work means checking in regularly with my feelings—identifying when fear or resentment arises and then choosing growth over shame. It’s about seeing mistakes as opportunities to learn instead of defining my worth. This process requires patience and courage but gradually builds resilience and wisdom. Ultimately, healing my heart has been about embracing the complexity of emotions and experiences, rather than seeking a perfect, pain-free state. It invites me to grow into a fuller version of myself who can love deeply, forgive genuinely, and remain tender despite life's inevitable challenges. If you’re on a similar journey, I encourage you to stay present with your heart’s work—it’s some of the most meaningful and rewarding healing you’ll do.
Self-analysis can be very theraputic...🥰