Part 7: gayboy sneeze delivers
Y'all I SNEEZED and I thought my baby came out!!
I was on the bed laying there...
Decided I wanted to go get some mashed potatoes and ketchup like I had last night....
But then I decided I was gonna get also my baby carrots and syrup for a dessert...
My husband ran to the store for eggs & ok hold up I gotta throw up rq...
Ok y'all, sorry... Egg yolk SENDSSS ME rn. ðŸ˜
Anyway, so I have all my stuff from the kitchen going to the bedroom to hurry and eat before babe gets back so I can tell him hurry up with dinner!!
Lool anyway, so I ALMOST make it to the bed & I felt the sneeze coming...
Regular good ole nasal clearing sneeze...
Y'all I achooed so hard I dropped EVERY snack... My bowl of baby carrots covered in maple syrup ALL IN MY CARPET!!
But that ain't even nothing...
I about fell to my knees.
Never in my life have I felt this immediate pressure in my chest/stomach area...
I gather every bit of energy I can grasp and get to the bed...
I slowly, while huffing and puffing in agony, lift my shirt & y'all look at me!!!
I launched my baby in pre birth mode with that sneeze!
That mf went ANY WHICH WAY IT COULD to avoid that PRESSURE!
I seen this and GASPED.
I took this pic and sent it to babe and he came RUSHING back y'all...
I'm dramatic so I hurry and get all my mess picked up tryna make sure there isn't anything...
I scoot the nightstand over the syrup and jump back in bed just in time for babe to come in yelling
"Baby!! Where are you!!"
I told him bedroom and he came running in.
But to only knock his last two toes in his foot in MY adidas slides and bout fell over...
30-45 seconds after doing the 'i can't move this hurts' face and holding his foot
He mustered up enough energy to make it to me...
Thankfully ignoring why the nightstand was 3 ft from where it was ðŸ˜
He grabs my hand after calming a second and kisses me...
I'm laying just like in the photo & he's asking am I alright and telling me let him see...
Same dramatic reveal to him with the slowly lifting my shirt & he sees it - looks at me in my eyes - looks back & FAINTED!
Well I had already decided I was gonna play like I was too weak and hurting to get up - so I hadda wait til he woke fully and completely act like I was helpless now...
As soon as I seen him coming to I laid back and starting wailing!!
"Why meeee!"
"It's always meeee!"
Boohoohoo
"I'm so pregnant and a guy and helpless!!"
And he JUMPS up and asked wth happened even tho he was piecing it together...
He told me to get up let's go
& I told him with a hand on my forehead to just go without me...
Leave me here to die!!
He told me
"Cut the crap Brandon - why would I go to the ER FOR YOU HAVING THE BABY PRE BIRTHED OUT UR STOMACH?! Make some SENSE IN THE DRAMATICS DARLIN!!'
I snapped out the drama cuz he was getting mad & told him
"Fine... Have it ur way..."
And jumped up and now we're in the car... On the way...
To the grocery store cuz that was all the syrup we had & I'm EATING MY CARROTS AND SYRUP or he can go play fake pregnant at the ER like some crazy person. 😉
If you're new here, yes it always be like this - hit follow so you don't miss.
Gayboy Pregnancy Chronicles #8
#ViralDiary