Vent post

Oh wow, I totally get where you're coming from. Reading your post brought back so many memories of my own struggles with calorie deficits and the absolute frustration of the scale going up, even when you're trying to do things "right." It's incredibly disheartening when you've been so disciplined, especially coming from a very low intake like 800 calories, and then you see even a slight gain like 0.2 pounds. It truly feels like all your hard work is unraveling, and that fear of gaining all the weight back is so real and terrifying. Many of us who have been through significant calorie restriction can relate to this experience when slowly increasing intake. It's a common phenomenon, and often, that initial slight bump on the scale isn't necessarily actual fat gain, but rather a combination of factors. When you're eating at extremely low levels, your body depletes its glycogen stores. Glycogen binds to water, so as you increase your food intake, especially carbohydrates, your body replenishes these stores, and with them comes water. This can easily account for a pound or two of 'water weight.' Also, simply having more food in your digestive system can add to the number on the scale. It's not fat, just temporary weight from food and water. What you're attempting by slowly increasing your calories to a more sustainable maintenance level like 1500 (especially for a sedentary lifestyle after such a low deficit) is often called 'reverse dieting' or 'metabolic recovery,' and it's a really smart move for long-term health and maintaining your weight loss. Your metabolism might have adapted to the lower calorie intake, slowing down to conserve energy. Gradually increasing calories can help 'reboot' your metabolism, allowing you to eat more without gaining weight in the long run. However, this process often comes with some initial fluctuations on the scale as your body adjusts. It's a marathon, not a sprint, and patience is key. I remember when I was going from an incredibly strict 1000-calorie diet up to 1500, I was obsessed with the scale. Every 0.1-pound increase felt like a personal failure, and I'd spiral into anxiety. What helped me was to remember that weight fluctuates daily, sometimes even hourly, due to hydration, sodium intake, sleep, stress, and hormonal changes. Focusing too much on those tiny daily numbers can be incredibly damaging to your mental health. Instead, try looking at weekly averages or even monthly trends. It's completely normal to feel sad and frustrated during this phase. This journey is as much about mental resilience as it is about physical changes. Don't let that 0.2 pounds define your progress or your worth. You're doing something courageous by trying to find a sustainable and healthier way to live. Keep focusing on nourishing your body, listening to its signals, and if the anxiety becomes overwhelming, perhaps chat with a registered dietitian who specializes in metabolic recovery. They can offer personalized guidance and reassurance during this tricky but ultimately beneficial transition. You're not alone in this struggle, and your feelings are totally valid.