I couldn't have re-contacted if not for going no c
I overcame so much that was meant to destroy me. I grew through situations designed to keep me small. I healed loudly through sharing my trauma, and today I can share my healing. I faced suppression and had my name dragged through the mud for many years only to become what they were most afraid of. Today I have self-esteem, today I love who I am, today I'm proud of myself for what I overcame, and today I know I can accomplish anything I put my mind to. I am no longer the scapegoat, I am no longer usable to those who seek to abuse me. I have become everything they feared I would be if I ever healed. Today my life is under my control alone. today I can help others overcome the situations I thought I never could. I am grateful to the survivors who spoke out before me, they gave me the courage to heal loudly. I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for the people sharing their knowledge on coercive control and surviving it. I never had words for the abuse I was going through until I found the words. Today I want to help others find the peace I have, guide them, and help advocates be better advocates. I have knowledge that can not only help survivors but destroy the entire methodology and system used to coercively control us and show people how to spot darvo, call it out, and realize what real survivors do. I have had a passion for helping people my entire life, but due to the trauma I only ever helped my abusers. Today I am the most authentic version of myself I have ever been, I have become stronger than I ever thought I would be. I know nothing in this world is ever made me happier than when I thought I was helping someone out of a horrible situation like those I have been through. I couldn't help anyone until I realized my own strength, until I healed from my own trauma enough to be an example, until I realized that even if I find that I have supported someone doing darvo, I will just as loudly call out the darvo once I see it. I would never want a single dime for helping anyone, for me that feeling of knowing I helped would only be cheapened if money were involved. I could never understand trauma coaches and therapists who charge who have also claimed to have been survivors as well. as a survivor who was kept on a tight financial leash by my abusers I understand that survivors often can't afford therapy or services that are safe. I had access to Medicaid paid therapy but my abusers would abuse the anonymized request process to fraudulently request anonymized versions of files under the guise of research just so they can make sure I wasn't talking about them. so even those of us who have access to therapy doesn't guarantee access to safe therapy. I healed from the motivational quotes from survivor groups and learning the terms from those same motivational quotes. I had to as Dr Doyle would say MacGyver my recovery together from scratch. I want to provide that same kind of energy here that helped me recover when I couldn't even let anyone know I was healing or trying to. I love what I am today, I know my value today and no one can convince me otherwise. I know I'm going to change the world one day, and there's nothing my abusers can do to stop me. We're all going to change the world one day, they wouldn't spend so much energy to try to keep us down if they weren't afraid of how far up we could go.
Going no contact is often a crucial step in escaping abusive relationships, but life’s practical demands, like retrieving essential documents, sometimes require temporary re-contact. I faced this challenge when I needed to regain my social security card and birth certificate. Even though I had to break no contact briefly, I count that moment as my "rebirthday," a fresh start in my ongoing healing journey. This experience reinforced how no contact is not about perfection but about prioritizing safety and emotional freedom. Navigating life after abuse means learning to recognize and resist coercive control tactics, including the manipulative defense strategy called DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender). Recognizing these patterns empowered me to protect my boundaries and support others in doing the same. When I learned the language to describe what I endured, it gave me strength to speak out loudly and break free from invisibility. Accessing therapy as a survivor can be complicated. Though I qualified for Medicaid, my abusers attempted to exploit the system to monitor my recovery. This painful reality reminded me that safe and confidential support isn’t always guaranteed, motivating me to create accessible resources free from financial burden or exploitation. Healing often requires "MacGyvering" your own path by piecing together knowledge from survivor communities, motivational quotes, and personal resilience. Ultimately, moving beyond trauma means reclaiming your narrative and realizing your worth. Turning my survival into advocacy is the most authentic expression of myself. I find profound joy in helping others escape abusive situations without expecting anything in return. My journey proved that healing loudly and openly can dismantle the systems of control and change not just individual lives but the world. We survivors are powerful — no one can stop how far we will rise.