Their attempts to hurt me do not work, but instead
Their attempts to hurt me do not work, but instead become learning experiences for others on how to spot and call out abuse. It becomes rarer and rarer over time as abusers become less likely to do so knowing I will call them out each and every time publicly across multiple platforms. It is so rare these days to see it happen that it's actually pretty exciting when it does. I love opportunities to use people's abusive tactics as means of holding them accountable while also educating others on the tactic being used and explaining what is going on so other survivors realize for themselves. I love that I can be an example for others to follow today. I love that every attempt to abuse me today I can use as an educational experience for other survivors and advocates for survivors. The only thing that sucks about it is that it becomes so rare because while my abusers and abusers in general are generally very dumb, they eventually realize doing so here never ends well for them. I used to be able to show how abusers would attack that's why we were sharing our truth, and explain how only abusers needed people to attack us while we were sharing our truth. no survivor in the history of survivors has ever sent anyone to accuse and abuser during their smear campaign, and once I made it clear I was going to continue to call that out and every instance eventually it just stopped. that was kind of sad because I enjoyed sharing that fact with other survivors, but there are still abusers dumb enough to offer backhanded compliments thinking no one will realize it other than the survivor. So I am grateful that abusive people are not very intelligent, otherwise it would not be as easy to use their attacks to educate survivors as it is.
From my own experience, I've found that when someone tries to hurt me through backhanded compliments or manipulative behaviors, the best response is transparency and education. Rather than internalizing the negativity, I share these moments openly, explaining the abusive tactics at play. This approach not only disarms the abuser but also helps others recognize similar patterns in their own lives. It's empowering to transform these negative interactions into opportunities for advocacy. For instance, explaining how gaslighting or smear campaigns operate has helped many survivors understand they are not alone and that abuse often relies on secrecy and manipulation. Over time, as I consistently call out these behaviors across multiple platforms, I’ve noticed a significant decline in abuse targeting me, proving that accountability discourages harmful actions. Another valuable insight I've gained is that abusers often underestimate the impact of public exposure. When their tactics are unveiled and discussed openly, it reduces their power and isolates them. This transparency fosters a safer environment where survivors feel supported and informed. If you face similar challenges, consider documenting and sharing your experiences responsibly. Educating your community or followers about abusive tactics can create a ripple effect, encouraging more victims to speak out and ultimately contributing to cultural change that denounces abuse. Remember, turning attempts to hurt you into teachable moments is not only liberating but also a powerful form of resistance. By being an example and advocate, you help build resilience and awareness, making it harder for abuse to thrive.