My Dad
I met my dad at 16 years old after thinking he was dead for 16 years. I’m adopted but I was adopted by my mom through foster care at the age of 12 after 6 years of being in the system, so I know my biological mothers side pretty well, when I post pictures with a bald man that’s my grandfather. But my bio mom had me when she was in the Air Force and said my dad jumped into the Mississippi River, which is really funny because I was born in Texas. So I had no hope to ever meet my dad or know anything about him or his side.
For Christmas 2018 my mom got me a DNA test just to see if anything came up. So I spit in a tube sent it off and found out: I am very white, almost exclusively Irish/Scottish and way less Norwegian than my family said. But I had no “this man shares half your dna” so I figured that was the end.
Little did I know my mom had asked a DNA Angel on Facebook to help her. If you don’t know what that is it’s someone who can find out who you’re related to by comparing DNA off of multiple different sources. She found a cousin of my dad’s who had gotten swabbed and then she found my dad and his brothers. She then pulled a full internet sluth and found out my Dad was stationed with my Bio mom around the right time. So my mom reached out to him.
Meanwhile I was in my biology class showing my teacher my family tree mere minutes before my dad’s side got added.
After he had a whole “oh no I’ve had a kid who I didn’t know about” he told my adopted sister on his side about me. And then my mom finally told me when she knew he wanted contact.
It was hard for us at first, he never thought he would have any biological children and I thought I would never have a Dad. I had a few people I needed to tell before I let everyone else know and so did he. So we gave ourselves time to get used to the idea. But there was another issue, my dad lives in Wyoming and I live in Missouri. So he came to Missouri with my British sister and there was a blizzard. Honestly it was really nice getting to meet him.
I started going to Wyoming, not often because when I do go it snows. Even when I go during summer, it’s a real problem. He had me work a Rodeo for free, I met and rode his horse Pippi.
Meeting my dad is something very special to me. I also get to say I have being a nerd in my DNA. My dad and I play the same games and read a lot of the same books. He would get dressed up for Disney on Ice and I would cosplay for cons. He got me into Dungeons and Dragons and has honestly been the best dad a girl could ask for.
Have you taken a DNA test?
#lemon8contest #AskLemon8 #biologicalfather #adopted #embracevulnerability
It's incredible how many of us out there are yearning to connect with our biological roots, especially when it comes to finding a parent we never knew. My journey started with a simple DNA test, and I can tell you, it's often the first step for many. If you're considering looking for your dad or another biological parent, here are some things I learned along the way. First off, DNA testing services like the one my mom gave me for Christmas are powerful tools. They don't just tell you your ancestry; they can connect you with relatives you never knew existed. When you submit your DNA, the service compares it to others in their database, looking for matches. For me, it wasn't an immediate match with my dad, but with a cousin. This is where the magic of 'DNA Angels' or genetic genealogists comes in. These amazing volunteers or professionals specialize in using DNA matches, public records, and social media to piece together family trees. They can be incredibly helpful in navigating complex family mysteries, especially if your initial matches aren't direct. Once a potential parent is identified, the emotional rollercoaster truly begins. For me, the initial shock for both my dad and me was immense. He never knew he had a child, and I had always believed he was gone. It's so important to prepare yourself for a range of emotions – excitement, anxiety, happiness, and even a bit of sadness for lost time. Communication is key, but don't rush it. My mom mediated the initial contact, which helped create a safe space for us to process everything. Remember, the other person might be just as overwhelmed as you are. Overcoming geographical distance was another big part of my story. Living in Missouri while my dad was in Wyoming meant we had to get creative. Our first meeting, in a blizzard no less, was so special. It wasn't just about talking; it was about doing things together – like working a rodeo and riding his horse, Pippi. These shared experiences, even simple ones, helped us build a bond that felt natural and strong. If you're facing similar distances, consider video calls, letters, and planning trips focused on activities you can enjoy together. It's these moments, like getting to ride a horse for the first time with him, that truly solidify the connection. Finding your biological parent can be a long and winding road, but the joy of discovering shared traits, like a love for Dungeons and Dragons or being a total nerd, makes every step worth it. It’s a unique journey, and one that has brought so much richness to my life.
I can’t imagine how you must of felt meeting him for the first time. My dad left when I was 4 and haven’t heard a word from him since. I have no clue if he’s even alive. I did a dna test as well and didn’t find him that way. My mom and aunt did a dna test too and they found out they were half sisters! Definitely crazy. I know a girl did a dna test and got her grandma arrested from a cold case years ago. Hopefully I can find out if he’s alive or not. I’m glad you found your dad!!