questions to ask your partner BEFORE MARRIAGE 💍
Marriage is a huge step in taking your relationship to the next level and it’s a big commitment. Having clear and open communication will help your relationship go far. Before getting married, consider asking your partner these questions!
1) where are we going to live after we get married?
2) do you want to have kids? If so, how many?
3) what are your thoughts about getting pets together? If so, what pet and how many?
4) where do we see our lives 5 years from now?
5) would you be open to relocating to another city? another state?
6) who’s family will we spend the holidays with?
7) how are we going to manage our finances after marriage?
8) how are we going to split up house chores?
9) are you religious? if so, would you want to go to church together on sundays?
10) if you’re not religious, would you be open to still attending church together?
11) how are we going to split rent payments, utilities, groceries, etc?
12) how are we going to resolve conflict?
13) what are your future goals for yourself?
14) what values are important to you?
15) would you consider taking couple’s therapy?
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Taking the leap into marriage is one of the biggest commitments you'll ever make, and it's so much more than just a wedding day. From my own experience, I can tell you that the conversations you have before saying "I do" are just as important as the vows themselves. It's not about avoiding disagreements, but about building a strong foundation of understanding and trust that can weather any storm. One of the most vital areas to dive deep into is finances. I remember how awkward it felt at first to discuss money openly, but it's crucial! Go beyond just "how will we manage our finances?" Talk about your individual spending habits, any existing debt (student loans, credit cards), and what your savings goals are. Do you envision joint accounts, separate accounts, or a hybrid approach? What about big purchases like a house or car? Understanding each other's financial philosophies early on can prevent so many future arguments. It really helps to lay all your cards on the table and create a shared vision for your financial future. Next up are future plans and family dynamics. This touches on so many aspects of your life together. When we discussed having children, it wasn't just about whether we wanted them, but how many, when, and what our parenting styles might look like. And what about pets? A small detail, but it can be a big commitment! We also explored topics like relocation for career opportunities, and how we'd handle holidays and traditions with both families. These conversations made us realize how important it was to align our long-term goals and values—or at least understand where we might have differences and how we'd navigate them respectfully. Then there's the nitty-gritty of daily life and conflict resolution. We talked about how we'd split chores (and who hates doing what!). But more importantly, we focused on how we would resolve disagreements. It's easy to assume you'll always communicate perfectly, but in reality, learning each other's conflict styles – whether someone needs space, prefers to talk it out immediately, or needs time to process – is a game-changer. We even discussed the idea of couple's therapy as a preventative measure, not just a last resort, which I believe is a sign of a truly strong relationship. Understanding each other's personal goals and how you'll support them while also building a shared life is paramount. Ultimately, these pre-marriage discussions are about creating a blueprint for your life together. They help you uncover potential challenges, celebrate shared dreams, and build a partnership where open communication is not just expected, but cherished. It's an ongoing dialogue, not a one-time checklist, and it makes the journey of marriage so much richer.




If you can’t l agree on religion it’s gonna be a terrible marriage