Never Give Up

2016 in November was the year and time when my life was gonna change forever, knowing that my Late Mother was no longer on this earth. At the time I was apart of that photo, I thought I was gonna be ok. I thought I was gonna take it day by day and be alright. Little did I know that after that day, and as the days, weeks, months, and years went by who would've thought that my life would turn into a downward spiral.

By the time 2020 was around, not only was it the tragedy and situation of the Covid Virus going around and remaining in quarantine just as the rest of us were. But by that time from the years before my depression was at an all time low. I just didn't have the drive in me, no motivation, no happiness, and the majority of the days throughout the week consuming alcohol and junk food. It got bad to the point where I was losing jobs time and time again because I wasn't able to handle the pace and work flow wherever I was working because I was too out of shape and out of breath. Thus management was impatient, and in the end they would let me go.

In that photo in 2020 I was at my all time highest in weight as I reached the 500 pound mark according to multiple scales I would stand on and check my weight in stores. But that photo also in 2020 I remember my sister took because since she got a new phone she wanted to try out its camera features. Then it hit my sister, seeing how I was and struggling to even stand and walk anywhere, that possibly that photo might just be one of the last photos she would've ever taken of me. Because if I didn't change my habits by that time? Lord knows if would've even been alive at this point.

Two years later in 2022 and late at night in my home, I began having severe chest pains and started seeing black dots all around me. Luckily my dad was home from work early and noticed not only that I was breathing strangely and holding my left chest. But as he got closer he saw my eyes and noticed that my pupils were was dilated as an owl. With my history of panic attacks and hyperventilating that what I thought it was. But something told my father to call for an ambulance.

So he did. And heading to the hospital connected to monitors, the monitors were showing that my heart rate was hitting 90+ breats a minute, and my blood pressure began rising to 180+ over 110+

It was mostly due to my hyperventilating and anxiety. But it was definitely also due to my weight and being obese.

At the hospital the staff providede me with pills that helped me relaxed and helps lover my heart rate and blood pressure, and told my father that if he didnt call for an ambulance and I went to sleep ignoring those pains. I might not have woken up the next day and would've passed in my sleep.

At that point reality hit me.

And my sister, and even the doctor flat out told me like it is and told me, "if you don't do anything about your health and weight now? You're not gonna live a long life, and you're gonna die a very young age. Do you want that"?

"Don't you wanna see Audrinna graduate and see her get married"? "Don't you wanna get married? Have a wife, child, or children and live your life"? "Well dammit John it's time to do something about it"!! I'll never forget those words my sister and that doctor told me. And began on the next day up to this point, to get back to who l used to be before my mother passed. And to be a better me overall. Physically, mentally, and spiritually.

The journey is not over. For everyday we're blessed to have is another day and opportunity to strive for greatness and to love our lives to the absolute fullest. Keep going everyday until you can't no more. Progress is Progress as long as you're improving, and never giving up. #fitnessjourney #fitness #gym El Paso