How do I stop sabotaging my relationships?

Self-sabotaging relationships can often stem from deep-seated fears and feelings of unworthiness, which makes breaking the cycle difficult but not impossible. If you’re struggling with self-doubt and anxiety that lead to pushing loved ones away, recognize that these feelings are common and valid, but they don’t have to dictate your future. One of the first steps toward healing is cultivating self-compassion. Understand that everyone has flaws and makes mistakes, and forgiving yourself is crucial to moving forward. Therapy, as you’ve started, can be an invaluable space for unpacking these fears and developing new coping strategies that don’t involve ending relationships prematurely. Communication plays a vital role in building trust and connection. Even with busy schedules or high-responsibility jobs, making time for open and honest conversations helps prevent misunderstandings and emotional distance. Sharing your fears and vulnerabilities with your partner can strengthen your bond rather than threaten it. Health struggles can understandably cause fears of being a burden, but a loving partner, especially one familiar with healthcare, often values emotional honesty and support as much as physical care. Addressing your anxiety and depression steadily, and reminding yourself that your worth is not contingent on perfect health, can alleviate some of this pressure. Lastly, consider balancing independence with intimacy — allowing yourself to receive love and support while maintaining your own goals and wellbeing. Building a healthy relationship is a process, often requiring patience, forgiveness, and consistent self-growth. Remember, you deserve happiness and a lifelong partnership free from self-sabotage.