Many people often feel discouraged about their abilities in intimate relationships, believing that they are simply "not good at sex." I can totally relate to this sentiment, and I’ve found a helpful way to reframe this feeling through my own experience with learning to drive. It took me four attempts and nearly $10,000 to pass my driving test. At one point, I even considered giving up, frustrated by the time, effort, and money spent. But what kept me going was the realization that skill isn’t something you’re born with; it’s developed through consistent practice and patience. The same principle applies to sexual confidence and relationship skills. From my coaching perspective, it’s important to recognize that everyone has different talents and learning curves, and comparing yourself to others isn’t productive. What really counts is your willingness to gain knowledge, try new approaches, and keep refining your skills over time. With each attempt, just like my driving test, you learn something new, which builds your competence and confidence. I encourage anyone feeling "not good" at intimacy to think of it as a journey where mistakes and setbacks are simply part of the learning process. Engaging with supportive resources, like online courses or coaching, can be incredibly helpful. They provide information and exercises that you can practice to grow more comfortable and skilled. Remember, becoming "good" at something—whether driving or intimacy—is about commitment and persistence, not perfection right away. So, if you’re struggling, don’t give up. View it as a skill to be developed, and know that with time, patience, and the right support, progress is absolutely achievable.