my hot takes as a mom
I was an only child and had never spent much time around little kids until I had my son. He’s almost three now, and we’re still figuring it out as we go - some things we handle the “conventional” way, others we adjust to what works best for our family. These aren’t my only controversial parenting choices, but they’re the ones that have sparked the most pushback lately.
1. No strict bedtime.
We start our nightly routine at 6 p.m. - dinner, bath, pajamas, teeth brushing - but from there, we go a little off-script. Once he’s ready for bed, it’s “room time,” and he gets to decide whether he wants to play quietly or go straight to sleep. My kid has never liked being put to bed; he’d rather wind down on his own. We time things so that even if he plays for a bit, he’s usually asleep by 7:30. Not forcing it makes evenings calmer all around.
2. Screens in moderation.
We’re not a screen-free family, but screens also don’t run the show. We watch Bluey, Ms. Rachel, and StoryBots - the typical toddler lineup - but for the most part the screens stay off. My son doesn’t know how to even use phones or tablets yet. As he grows, we’ll ease him into tech so he’s not blindsided when he starts school, but for now, the low-tech life works for us.
3. No “bad” words.
With the exception of slurs, I don’t believe words are good or bad - it’s the intent behind them that matters. My husband and I have dialed back our swearing a lot since becoming parents, but sometimes things slip. I don’t encourage it, but if my son has the occasional “oh sh*t” moment, I’m not too bothered. To me, what matters most is that he uses language to build people up, not tear them down.
4. No “bad” foods, either.
Our approach to food is similar. The only truly “bad” foods are those that are spoiled or make us sick. Fruits and veggies? Great foods, great benefits. Cookies and sweets? Also great - just in different ways. The goal is to listen to our bodies and give them what they need, which can look totally different from day to day.
Raising these tiny humans is an ongoing experiment. We’re all just trying to find what works best for our own kids because parenting isn’t one-size-fits-all. What’s one “controversial” choice that works for your family?
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