Pretty Girls Dont Play Fair
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“What?” Audra asked again, softer this time, like she already knew whatever was coming wasn’t small.
Shawn let out a short breath, shaking her head like she was trying to keep it together—but her jaw was tight, her eyes locked in.
“You not even looking at me, Audra,” she said low. “You answering me, but you not here. That’s what I’m talking about.”
Audra finally glanced up, but it was quick—too quick. “I just told you, I been busy. Classes, work, life—”
“Stop,” Shawn cut in, holding her hand up. “Don’t do that. Don’t give me that basic answer like I’m just anybody on this campus.”
Audra’s lips parted, but nothing came out.
Shawn stepped closer, lowering her voice. “I know you. So either something happened… or you avoiding me.”
A beat passed. The air between them got heavy.
“I’m not avoiding you,” Audra said, but it didn’t land right. Even she seemed unsure of it.
Shawn tilted her head slightly. “Then why it feel like every time I get close, you got somewhere else to be?”
Audra swallowed hard, her fingers tightening around the strap of her bag. “Because it’s easier.”
Shawn frowned. “Easier than what?”
Audra hesitated. Her eyes flickered up to Shawn’s—this time she didn’t look away.
“Easier than dealing with… whatever this is,” she admitted quietly.
Shawn’s expression shifted, confusion mixing with something deeper. “Whatever what is?”
Audra let out a shaky breath, like she’d been holding it in for days.
“Us, Shawn.”
Silence dropped between them.
Shawn blinked once, then let out a small, almost disbelieving laugh. “Us?” she repeated. “Since when was there an us to run from?”
Audra’s eyes softened, but there was fear sitting right behind them.
“That’s the problem,” she said. “You don’t even see it.”
Shawn’s smile faded slow, like the weight of that finally hit somewhere real.
“Then help me see it,” she said, her voice quieter now—but steady. “Because right now, it just feel like you pulling away for no reason.”
Audra looked around for a second, like the open campus suddenly felt too exposed. People passing, laughing, living—it made this moment feel even more raw.
“You ever notice how you act with me?” Audra asked.
Shawn frowned. “What you mean?”
“You be… different,” Audra said carefully. “With everybody else, you chill, you joking, you don’t care. But with me?” She shook her head slightly. “You look at me like… like I matter too much.”
Shawn’s brows pulled together. “You do matter.”
“That’s not normal, Shawn,” Audra said quickly, almost cutting her off. “Not the way you mean it.”
“And what way is that?” Shawn challenged, stepping closer again.
Audra’s breath hitched just a little. “You be needing me,” she said. “You said it yourself.”
“Yeah, I do,” Shawn replied without hesitation. “Ain’t nothing wrong with that.”
Audra let out a soft, frustrated laugh. “You don’t get it.”
“Then make me get it,” Shawn pressed.
Another pause.
Audra looked at her—really looked this time. Like she was tired of dodging.
“Because I started needing you too,” she admitted.
That landed different.
Shawn didn’t speak right away. The tension in her shoulders eased just a little, but her eyes stayed locked on Audra like she was trying to read every word twice.
“…And that’s a problem?” she asked.
Audra nodded slowly. “Yeah.”
“Why?”
Audra exhaled through her nose, glancing away for just a second before bringing her eyes back.
“Because I don’t know what that turns into,” she said. “And I’m not about to be out here confused… or hurt… over something that wasn’t even supposed to happen.”
Shawn’s expression softened, but there was still a firmness in her tone.
“Who said it wasn’t supposed to happen?”
“I did,” Audra said immediately. “A long time ago.”
Shawn studied her face. “Before me?”
Audra didn’t answer right away, but that silence was answer enough.
Shawn nodded slowly. “So this ain’t really about me,” she said. “It’s about whatever rules you made for yourself.”
Audra’s lips pressed together. “Call it what you want.”
“I’m calling it what it is,” Shawn said. “You scared.”
Audra’s eyes flashed. “I’m not scared.”
“You are,” Shawn said, softer now. “Not of me… but of what you feel when you around me.”
That hit a nerve. Audra ’s jaw tightened.
“You don’t just get to say that,” she snapped.
“Then tell me I’m wrong,” Shawn shot back, stepping even closer—close enough that Audra didn’t move this time.
The space between them was thin now. Charged.
Audra’s voice dropped. “You are.”
But it didn’t sound convincing.
Shawn held her gaze, searching. “Then look me in my eyes and say you don’t feel nothing.”
Audra hesitated.
And that hesitation said everything.
Shawn’s voice softened even more. “Say it.”
Audra opened her mouth… then closed it.
Her eyes flickered down to Shawn’s lips for just a second—too quick, but Shawn caught it.
And that was all she needed.
“…Yeah,” Shawn whispered. “That’s what I thought.”
Audra stepped back suddenly, like she needed air. “This is exactly what I mean,” she said, running a hand through her hair. “You be doing too much. Reading too deep into stuff.”
Shawn shook her head. “Nah. You just don’t like being seen.”
Audra laughed once, but there was no humor in it. “Or maybe I don’t like things getting messy.”
Shawn’s expression hardened just a little. “Feelings ain’t messy. People just don’t know how to handle them.”
“And you do?” Audra challenged.
Shawn didn’t even hesitate. “When it come to you? I’m trying to.”
That made Audra go quiet again.
A long pause stretched between them.
Then, softer—almost a whisper—
“You gon’ be the reason I lose focus,” Audra admitted.
Shawn stepped closer again, slower this time. Careful.
“Or maybe I’m the reason you finally pay attention,” she said.
Audra looked at her, really looked—and this time, there was no running in her eyes.
Just conflict.
And something dangerously close to giving in.
This story deeply resonates with anyone who has experienced the delicate dance of vulnerability within close relationships. From personal experience, I can relate to the complexity of feeling drawn to someone yet fearing what such intimacy might unlock. Audra and Shawn's exchange perfectly captures that bittersweet tension between wanting closeness and guarding our hearts to avoid confusion or pain. Often, when emotions intensify with one particular person, it can feel overwhelming compared to our interactions with others. The way Audra notices Shawn acting 'different'—more attentive, more needing—echoes a common dynamic where emotional stakes create an unspoken pressure. It’s difficult when you realize your feelings aren't just casual; they carry heavier expectations. Their honesty about needing each other, yet simultaneously pulling away due to uncertainty, is a familiar push-and-pull many face in fledgling relationships. The fear of what 'this' could escalate into, and whether it's worth risking confusion or heartbreak, is a challenge that demands courage and self-awareness. From my own perspective, the key to moving past this kind of impasse lies in open communication and mutual willingness to face discomfort. Audra’s admission of fear and Shawn’s patient insistence on understanding show how essential it is to acknowledge hidden feelings openly rather than letting them fester unspoken. What’s compelling here is also the theme of being 'seen'—and how unsettling that can be. When someone truly sees us beyond surface-level, it can force us to confront parts of ourselves we’d rather hide. Shawn's insight that Audra doesn’t like 'being seen' hints at deeper vulnerabilities we all sometimes protect by keeping emotional distance. For readers navigating personal relationships, this narrative encourages embracing emotional risks, recognizing when distance is a protective shield, and understanding that feelings, while messy, can also be the foundation for genuine connection. It’s a reminder that being honest with ourselves and others might initially cause discomfort but ultimately leads to clarity and growth.
