MOM HOT TAKE: stop telling me to “just enjoy this”

Motherhood is a complex journey filled with contrasting emotions that many find difficult to express openly. While the phrase "just enjoy it" is often well-meaning, it can unintentionally dismiss the daily challenges moms face, especially during taxing periods like caring for two children under two years old. Being a mom of two under two comes with unpredictable and exhausting days where survival—not enjoyment—becomes the immediate goal. It’s important to realize that loving your children doesn’t automatically translate into loving every moment of motherhood. Many moms experience a spectrum of feelings simultaneously—love, gratitude, exhaustion, and frustration—which can coexist without negating each other. Toxic positivity, such as constantly pushing moms to "enjoy the hard times," can feel dismissive and isolating. Instead, what supports moms best is honest communication, empathy, and validation. When someone acknowledges that a day is rough and says, "I get it, today was hard for me too," it creates a sense of community and relief. This authentic connection reassures moms that they are not alone in their struggles or emotions. In practical terms, this means creating spaces where moms feel safe admitting when they are overwhelmed without fearing judgment. Whether it's a moment spent crying quietly during a nap or simply pushing through the chaos without losing one’s mind, these experiences are valid and part of the motherhood story. Gratitude and exhaustion don't have to be in conflict; they often live side by side in the same home, painting a richer, more truthful picture of what it means to raise children. Understanding these realities can help shift cultural conversations about motherhood from glorification or forced positivity to real, supportive dialogue. This change can empower moms to seek and receive the community and honest support they need, making the beautiful and brutal days alike a part of their authentic motherhood journey.