The Day I Finally Changed My Name
I had wanted to change my name for almost 30 years.
Yes, you read that right. Thirty years. 😂
There were certain characters in my original name that always felt unnecessary to me. I never quite felt comfortable with it, and over the years, I became increasingly conscious of having to explain it.
But I kept putting off the idea of legally changing it.
Why?
The stigma.
I worried about what people would think. Would they find it strange? Would they think I was rejecting part of my identity? Would people judge me for changing the name I was given?
So I lived with it.
For years.
Until one day in 2022, I finally thought:
“You know what? My name is my name.”
And that was it.
I plucked up the courage and legally changed it.
I’m mixed, and because my face doesn’t necessarily look like I belong to one particular ethnic group, my original name often became a conversation starter.
“What’s your background?”
“Why is your name like that?”
“Where does your name come from?”
I used to find those questions rather tiring.
Today, I’m completely comfortable with my name.
And the funny thing?
I hardly get those questions anymore. 😂
Looking back, I wish I had done it sooner.
But perhaps I needed those 30 years to realise something very simple:
Sometimes, giving yourself permission to be comfortable with who you are is one of the bravest things you can do.
2022 was the year I finally chose my name.
And I’ve never looked back. 🌿
Changing one’s name can often be a deeply personal decision, intertwined with identity, culture, and self-expression. In my own experience, I found that the process not only involved legal steps but also emotional challenges. For many people, particularly those with multicultural backgrounds, names can invite constant questions about their heritage, sometimes leading to frustration or discomfort. In considering a name change, I realized that it is not about rejecting your past or your family, but about choosing a name that truly feels like you. The social stigma around changing names can be a significant barrier. Friends or family might react with surprise or concern, worrying it signals a rejection of one’s roots. What helped me was reframing the story — a name change is a form of self-care and authenticity, not a denial. Moreover, the legal process, while seemingly daunting, is usually straightforward when you break it down: filling out forms, submitting identification, and updating official documents. Having a clear goal and support from understanding loved ones made the journey smoother. Since changing my name, I've noticed a shift in how people perceive me and how I perceive myself. The relentless questions about my background faded, replaced by a sense of confidence and clarity. This transformation reminded me that giving yourself permission to live as your authentic self is one of the bravest and most rewarding acts you can undertake. If you’re thinking about changing your name, consider it as a step toward honoring who you truly are. It’s never too late to make this change, and with it comes the freedom to stop explaining and start living fully.
I hope you are happier, gurl. 🥰