making friends in your 20s? 👯‍♀️ CLT📍

Okay, so we've all been there, right? That feeling of 'IS IT ME?' when you're trying to figure out how to make friends in your 20s. It’s a completely valid question to ask yourself when it feels like everyone else has their social circle perfectly formed, and you’re left wondering what you’re doing wrong. But trust me, it’s not just you. Life in your 20s throws so many curveballs at us that make forming and maintaining friendships uniquely challenging. Suddenly, you’re out of college, maybe starting a new job, people are moving to different cities, getting serious with partners, or focusing on their careers. The built-in social circles we had in school — those easy, everyday interactions — just vanish. You're left with the task of actively seeking out new connections, and honestly, it can feel like a part-time job! There's also this constant pressure, amplified by social media, to always be doing something fun with a massive friend group, which just adds to the introspection and self-doubt. So, what can we actually do when making friends in your 20s feels like an uphill battle? I've been doing a lot of introspection and experimenting, and here's what I've found helpful and what I'm still trying to implement: Revisit Old Connections: Sometimes, the best new friends are old ones you've lost touch with. A friendly text to someone you vaguely knew from high school or college, or a former coworker, can spark something new. People change, and you might find a surprising connection with someone you once overlooked. Lean Into Your Hobbies (Seriously!): This is a big one! Join a book club, a hiking group, a pottery class, a local sports league, or even a volunteer group for a cause you care about. When you're doing something you genuinely enjoy, you naturally meet people with shared interests. It takes the pressure off 'finding a friend' and just lets connections happen organically. Plus, you already have a built-in conversation starter! Say 'Yes' More Often: Even if you're an introvert (like me!), pushing yourself to say yes to invitations can open doors. That casual coffee invite from a coworker? Take it! That friend-of-a-friend's birthday party? Go! You never know who you'll click with until you put yourself in new social situations. Be a Genuine Initiator: Don't always wait for others to make plans. If you connect with someone new, suggest a follow-up. 'I had fun chatting, maybe we could grab coffee next week?' It feels awkward at first, but it shows effort and that you're genuinely interested in building a connection. Utilize Apps (Cautiously): While platforms like Bumble BFF can feel a bit like dating, they can work for some! Just go in with an open mind, clear intentions, and prioritize safety. It’s another tool in your arsenal to meet people you might not otherwise cross paths with. Set Healthy Boundaries: The original post talks about feeling taken advantage of, and I totally get that. As we get older, learning to set boundaries is HUGE. It’s okay to realize a friendship isn’t serving you or that you’re putting in more effort than you’re getting back. Protecting your energy is essential for your mental health and making space for genuine connections. Remember, building genuine connections takes time and effort from both sides. It's not an overnight thing. There will be awkward moments, some ghosting, and definitely some friendships that fizzle out. Don't let that discourage you. Keep putting yourself out there, being your authentic self, and trust that the right people will gravitate towards you. Ultimately, it's a journey, and it's okay to feel introspective about it. Just know you're not alone in navigating this unique chapter of making friends in your 20s. We're all figuring it out together!