Is being nice making you a bad person?
At the end of the day, we’re all human and we make decisions that will change the next few minutes to years of our lives. When I ask this question, I’m talking to myself and my fellow girlies that feel like being nice all the time is always the answer. In some cases yes, but in most cases we’re sabotaging our happiness, our growth and our authenticity. So you might be a “bad person” to your needs without even knowing.
For example, I previously had a job that that drained me because I was compromising my time with family and with myself to work. I would be lectured for calling out sick or for taking care of family when they were extremely ill. But I did not say anything to “protect the peace” and it was to the point where I myself was becoming ill due to being overworked and afraid of losing my job. I was missing out on working on my career, family gatherings, sleep, eating and alone time. It’s NOT worth it.
Since working at age 16 as a young poc girly I’ve been told to basically cancel out my life for work just to land a job and to be humble with my pay despite me having much experience and professionalism. “ When are you available?” Any time (I’m actually not free until next week) “ how much are you looking to receive in this role” $19 (although the pay ranges from $19-$25).
Being nice is not necessarily a bad thing. We as women can’t be afraid to set boundaries with family, with other women/men and in the workplace.
As women it’s obvious that we are expected to suffer in silence, especially as women of color, we are expected to suffer in silence or else we are labeled as “ghetto” or “unprofessional”. We are seen as the ones to be okay with things and be the “peace” in the situation. Even when it comes to relationships we have to be the man’s peace and we are blamed for reacting to being mistreated.
No more compromising your health, your values, your pay, you’re too hot and talented to not pay attention to what you need! But be patient with yourself. We’re still learning everyday🤍💕
#girlpov #lemon8challenge #womenempowerment #mentalhealthawareness #GirlTalk
Being nice is often seen as a virtue, but as the post highlights, consistently prioritizing others' needs over your own can lead to burnout, diminishing your mental and physical health. It’s important to recognize that being 'nice' should never mean sacrificing your well-being or values. Setting clear boundaries is a crucial skill for maintaining healthy relationships and thriving in the workplace. For many women, especially women of color, societal expectations can pressure them into silence or compliance, even when facing unfair treatment. This dynamic often stems from harmful stereotypes that label women who assert themselves as "unprofessional" or "ghetto." Challenging these narratives by establishing boundaries helps reclaim personal power and fosters respect. In professional settings, asserting your worth includes negotiating pay that reflects your experience and not accepting unjust demands for availability or workload. This self-advocacy is essential for sustainable career growth and personal fulfillment. Moreover, in family or social contexts, saying "no" when necessary is vital to protect your energy and mental health. Developing self-awareness about when being 'too nice' becomes a form of self-neglect empowers you to create a healthier balance. Remember, you are not being a bad person for prioritizing your needs; you’re embracing authenticity and self-respect. Practicing patience and kindness toward yourself as you learn to set these boundaries is part of the ongoing journey toward empowerment and well-being. Ultimately, the concept of "being nice" doesn't mean you must suppress your voice or needs. True kindness starts with honoring yourself first, which enables you to genuinely show up for others without compromising your own happiness and health. Embrace boundary-setting as a form of self-care and a vital step toward living an empowered, authentic life.
this is such good advice to any girl out there 💛 i hope you are thriving in not just your career but personal life too now hun!!