12/2/25
Random Thoughts
💭What's on my mind:
Over the years I have always struggled with Anxiety and Depression, the only two things I can for sure assign labels to in order to describe the internal workings in my brain. Personally I 100% believe I have ADHD at the very least. I struggled with driving to work yesterday, and as a result was in a shut down most of the day. I did not feel like interacting with people virtually or in person at all aside from my kids. Today I woke up knowing I was not going to work as once again school was closed and there is noone to watch my kids in order for me to go to work along with the fact that one of my littles is ill. While knowing the expectations were low I still can't shake the feeling of failing my kids and myself by not being able to do the things I need to in order to provide for them. I have two jobs and this one is new and has far more hours. I should be motivated by the type of work I do and love and the paycheck in order to go to work, but somehow none of that every motivates me. I'm not one who cares about fancy items, I would rather by things second hand than brand new. What I care about is being my kids safe space. Being safe and warm at home with my kids is my happy place. I've often found myself fantasizing of being able to turn my hobby of arts and crafts into a career. That could support my kids and I long term. Maybe hosting some kids crafting events, as well as some social emotional groups. I grew up dreaming of being able to help kids "like me" who are often misunderstood and in turn misguided to pursue things that don't really align with their true selves. Maybe its a distant dream or maybe its nearer than I think...
Current Mood:
In my head, Daydreaming, Slow Start Kind of Day
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Many people like the author experience a mix of anxiety and depression alongside symptoms that suggest ADHD, which can create significant daily challenges, including struggles with motivation and social interactions. These mental health conditions often intertwine, impacting not just work but personal life and self-esteem. It’s especially difficult when additional responsibilities arise, such as caring for children at home during school closures or illness. The feeling of failing oneself and family can be overwhelming, even when the circumstances are beyond control. Recognizing these emotions and validating them is a crucial step towards healing. Finding purpose and joy in being a safe and supportive parent is a powerful motivation that many caregivers share. Creating a warm, stable environment can provide children with emotional security, which also uplifts the caregiver’s own spirit. Pursuing hobbies like arts and crafts presents an avenue for self-expression and self-care, and can even evolve into fulfilling career opportunities that align with personal values. Hosting crafting events and social-emotional groups for children can serve as a meaningful way to support others facing similar challenges. Such community involvement not only brings purpose but fosters connection, reducing isolation. Mental health experts recommend exploring creative outlets and community support as effective tools to complement therapy and coping strategies. If you recognize these struggles in your own life, consider reaching out to mental health professionals who can help with diagnosis and treatment for anxiety, depression, or ADHD. Online and local support groups also offer valuable resources and camaraderie. Day-to-day, taking small steps toward self-compassion, setting realistic expectations, and celebrating small victories can build resilience over time. Remember, you are not alone, and dreams—even distant ones—can move closer with hope, persistence, and a nurturing support system.