Should I stay?
We were happy for 2 years. Then 6 months ago, he got obsessed with working out: strict diet, no cheat days, hours at the gym. I barely see him now. He kept asking me to join and I thought it was his way of bonding. I got a membership (it mostly collects dust) and went sometimes, but I can’t keep up.
Last year’s knee injury still limits me, but he just gets upset, he says I’m not trying, that I should push harder. Then last week, he told me that he’s no longer attracted to me because of my weight. He called intimacy a chore and said if I don’t lose weight, he’ll break up with me. I begged him to stay and I promised I’d change.
He wants me to lose 5 kg first with more goals later. Our priorities don’t align anymore. If he’s willing to throw away 2 years over this, he’s not the guy I fell for. But I hate the thought of wasting all that time. Should I fight to save us?
Dealing with a partner who is no longer attracted to you because of your weight is incredibly painful and complicated. When your boyfriend said he's not attracted to you anymore because of your weight, it can shake your self-esteem and make you question your worth. But it’s important to remember that attraction should not be conditional to unrealistic expectations or yourself changing for someone else’s demands. If your boyfriend has become obsessed with working out, following a strict diet, and expects you to join in despite your knee injury limiting your activity, this suggests a growing disconnect in your priorities and lifestyles. Pressuring someone to lose weight and threatening a breakup over it can be emotionally harmful and a form of control rather than love. Rather than asking “Should I fight to save us?” you might consider whether this relationship respects your feelings, health, and identity. True bonding should never feel like a chore or based on image alone. Open communication about how his behavior affects you and seeking couples counseling could help clarify where you both stand. Also, focus on your own well-being and healing from your knee injury first. Health is not just physical but mental and emotional too. Accepting yourself and prioritizing self-love can empower you to make choices that preserve your happiness and dignity. If your boyfriend cannot appreciate you as you are or respect your physical limits, it may be time to reassess the relationship’s future. You deserve a partner who supports you through ups and downs—not just when you meet a certain physical ideal. Lastly, remember you are not alone. Many face relationship challenges related to body image and health struggles. Seeking advice from trusted friends, support groups, or professional therapists can provide comfort and guidance during such a difficult crossroads.
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