Being single at 26
I’ve never been in a real relationship. Sometimes I feel like men are not interested in me or that I’m too blind to see a good person in front of me. Lots of times I get asked out by the wrong men, but when I’m actually interested in someone they’re completely oblivious. Dating in general is incredibly hard for this day of hookup culture, which is why I avoid dating apps. Here’s what I do to try to remind myself it’s okay to be single:
🤍 Having high standards: I think this is both a good and a bad thing. While having high standards may keep me away from someone who’s interested in me, it also keeps me away from people who don’t deserve me. I’ve seen too many of my friends date guys who treated them poorly and only for them to find someone else that does the same thing. I don’t plan on being in a relationship like that.
🤍 Past trauma: I hated men for a long time because of how my dad treated me and my mom. After years of therapy, I know that not all men are my dad. I at least use my past to notice red flags sooner than others.
🤍 Praying to God: While I pray to find my future husband, I also pray to God to help change my mindset on being single. Being single doesn’t mean I’m unattractive or worthless. God just has a different plan for me. He wants me to fully find my self-worth before being with someone.
#Lemon8Diary #dating #singlelife #christiangirl #christiandating
It's easy to write about having high standards, but actually upholding them in the face of societal pressure or loneliness? That's the real challenge. I've learned that maintaining my standards isn't just about what I expect from a partner, but also about what I expect from myself. For me, that means actively avoiding situations or people that make me feel less than, even if it means fewer dates. I've found that politely declining invitations from 'wrong men' or stepping back from situations that feel off is a powerful act of self-respect. It's like I'm telling myself, 'You deserve better, and you're strong enough to wait for it.' This has been a huge part of learning to wait for the right person, as the OCR text reminds me. It's a continuous practice of reinforcing my own value. Another big piece of my journey, as I mentioned, is learning to heal from my past trauma. Therapy has been a lifeline, but outside of sessions, I've found practical ways to support my healing. Journaling, for instance, has become a sacred space for me to process emotions without judgment. I write letters to my younger self, acknowledge my feelings, and even challenge limiting beliefs that stem from past hurts. Engaging in creative outlets, whether it's painting or just doodling, also helps me express what words sometimes can't. These small, consistent actions help me not only heal but also build a stronger sense of self that isn't defined by past experiences. It’s about building a solid foundation within myself. When it comes to changing my mindset on being single, it’s not just about acceptance; it’s about active cultivation of joy and purpose. I've started focusing on personal achievements and hobbies that truly light me up. Whether it’s learning a new skill, volunteering, or deepening friendships, these activities fill my life with meaning and remind me of my inherent worth. This focus on personal growth makes me feel incredibly empowered. It's a shift from 'waiting to be chosen' to 'choosing myself' every single day. I've also found immense comfort and strength in my faith, praying to God to help me find perspective and peace. My prayers aren't just for a future husband, but for gratitude for my current blessings and guidance in my self-discovery journey. It's a constant reminder that my value isn't tied to my relationship status, but to who I am as a person, as a child of God. This mindset shift has transformed my single life from a period of waiting into a season of fruitful growth and self-love. It's truly okay to have high standards and to heal; these are signs of strength, not limitations.