I Had to Throw a Flag on My Own Thoughts. 🚩
One thing healing has taught me is that not every thought deserves a seat at the table.
For a long time, I believed every anxious prediction my mind came up with. If things were going well, I convinced myself something bad had to be around the corner. I’d prepare for conversations that hadn’t happened, grieve disappointments that didn’t exist yet, and mistake fear for facts.
Lately, I’ve been practicing something different.
Instead of believing every thought, I’ve started questioning them.
Sometimes I literally have to stop myself and think, “Wait… is there actually evidence for this?”
That’s what healing has looked like for me lately—not silencing my mind, but learning when to throw a flag on the thoughts that are trying to convince me of something that isn’t true.
Healing, for me, has become less about believing every feeling… and more about becoming a better referee.
🚩 False alarm. Play on.
Have you ever caught yourself preparing for something that never actually happened?
#HealingInRealTime #MentalHealthJourney #Overthinking #AnxietyRecovery #HealingJourney
In my own experience, I've found that becoming a referee between myself and my anxiety has been transformative. Often, our minds jump to conclusions, anticipating the worst-case scenario without any real evidence. For instance, I used to dread social interactions long before they happened, convinced I would say something wrong or be judged harshly. This constant overthinking drained my energy and stole the joy from present moments. What helped me was developing the habit of pausing and mentally throwing a 'flag' on my anxious thoughts—much like calling out a foul in a game. I would ask myself, "Is there concrete evidence for this worry?" More times than not, I'd realize the fear was based solely on assumption or past experiences, not reality. This practice didn't silence my thoughts, but it allowed me to create space between feeling and believing, reducing the hold anxiety had over me. Another key insight was learning to distinguish between useful thoughts and harmful overthinking. Not every anxious prediction deserves attention or energy. By directing my focus toward thoughts that are constructive and grounded, and gently setting aside those that are speculative or negative, I've managed to rebuild trust in my judgment and emotions. Ultimately, healing isn't about fighting or ignoring our minds but about becoming a discerning referee—knowing when to call 'false alarm' and when to act. If you find yourself preparing for events that may never occur or feeling trapped in cycles of worry, try practicing this mindful questioning. It can be a powerful step toward mental clarity and emotional resilience.
Yes! If you are a survivor of abuse, congratulations on still standing. Also, know that a lot of the strategies you had to build to survive back then can prevent you from moving g forward and healing. You CAN unlearn them! You can enjoy good things without expecting something bad to happen. You can unlearn the hypervigilance that previously kept you safe. When you have one of those dreadful thoughts, please put things on hold for 30 minutes. That will give your rational brain time to process facts so your emotional brain doesn’t run amok with playing old situations that no longer exist.