1 Sad Truth on PARENTING
Something people hardly talk about but most have experienced.
You can’t force people to be in your kids life!
Since I was even pregnant with my son my circle has been ever changing. People got closer, people distanced themselves, some people stayed there through it all.
What sucks is I feel like there’s a chunk of people that should have been the ride or die changed. My son’s father, my late husband, passed away some years back. His family was around for these last 3 years. I try to keep myself open and available, try to keep the lines of communication open. As some know, I recently got remarried. I was widowed at 26 and I didn’t want to go through life alone. But they distanced themselves since. It’s been over a month. Empty messages left on read. I invited them out to celebrate my son’s upcoming start of pre-k and no answer.
There’s not much more I can do. Im not going to beg them to be there. My son has more than enough love right here in front of him. My new husband is so involved with him and makes my son so happy.
My son doesn’t have memories of his bio dad. He was only a year and a half when he passed from covid. He still pics him out in photos and so he knows he had him once upon a time. Recently he asked how did he die and I told him he got very sick and didn’t make it. It’s not a secret. I want him to come to me with these questions.
Even though our day to day is fairly joyful, it’s hard seeing what’s my son’s family, the strongest connection to his father, kind of stop responding.
There’s other people too I lost along the way due to the separation between my late husband and I (he wasn’t taking care of himself and becoming violent, I wasn’t home when he got sick). Then the dating I went through after he died. People rotated. My life was messy. And my son suffered the consequence of that too. Family became distant. A few friends became distant. Yet other relationships got stronger too. Some people I didn’t talk to in years came back.
Truth is as a parent, friends and family may not always be there for you. But as a parent, it’s your job to be there for your child every step of the way. They look up to you first. You’re the first example they have on what love is. Treasure it!
Parenting is often filled with unexpected challenges, especially when it comes to maintaining relationships with family and friends. After losing a partner, the dynamics of these relationships can shift drastically, leaving parents questioning their support system. As seen in many cases, some friends may distance themselves during difficult times while others become closer. It's crucial to understand that you can't force people to stay in your child's life. Instead, focus on cultivating a loving environment with those who are present and eager to contribute positively to your child's upbringing. Resilience is a significant trait for both parents and children. After losing a loved one, children may not have memories of their parent, yet they still form connections to their identity through stories and photographs. Encouraging open conversations about their feelings can help foster a stronger bond and emotional intelligence. As a parent, being the unwavering source of love and stability is the most vital role. Remember, it's the quality of relationships that matter rather than the quantity. Moreover, dealing with grief and the intricacies of single parenting entails navigating through various social circles and often revisiting the notion of family. Parents who have experienced loss should not hesitate to seek support from other parents or communities that understand their journey. Each parent's path is unique, and sharing stories can provide solace and help heal old wounds. Finding joy and strength in the love that surrounds you can make all the difference in parenting amid life's challenges.
I’ve literally been in therapy for a few months coming to terms with the fact that my partners family just doesn’t make time to see our son and they all live off our exit 😭 but I feel comfort in knowing I have so much love he is given and all the people who do show him love instead of focusing on the love that isnt