Learning 2 love myself & 2024

I am very transparent with a lot of things I have experienced in my life. I hope that sharing a few things that I am going through and also the things that I am doing to cope and heal will motivate you all.🫶💕🥳🔐

I'm human and I understand that this is life and I have to experience things and learn from my mistakes. With that being said I no longer live with regrets. Yeah true enough I've been hurt in relationships, friendships, family, etc. But I'm thankful I'm learning early so that I don't ignore the red flags with everyone I meet because my time is precious and although it took me some time I know my worth now so I'm done making excuses and being blind to people's actions because I love them. It's ok to start over and it's ok to love people from a distance but never expect someone to love you correctly when you don't even love yourself don't sit and try to convince yourself you do because if you did you wouldn't constantly allow yourself to be in situations where your not handled with care. A lot of things are easier said than done and trust and believe when you get tired you will leave. Just don't wait too late.

I was been abused growing up by the people I loved the most and as a child, I wanted to be accepted badly. I had a verbally abusive mom, and family issues with my dad I can't mention but it made my sister hated me, I was SA, I was mistreated, and jumped on, and so much more. the things I experienced affected me so badly in my adult life that I was never able to recover I have major depression, trauma disorder, and Ptsd. I was never able to express how I felt and was told I wasn't depressed when I was telling people I wanted to unalive myself. Imagine how that felt. I was never loved correctly so when I did find “love” it wasn't love but I accepted it because it was the only love I knew. I put up with things I had no business going through for too long. I cried more than I smiled. I tried to take the easy way out because I lost hope and attempted on my life in October of 2023 but god had other plans for me. That was a real eye-opener for me. Although everything doesn't happen overnight I stopped relying on others to make me happy. I choose me. I went through some things after that triggered me so badly that I had no choice but to stand on 10 toes. I learned that loving the wrong people can make you hate them including yourself….

Things I'm doing to heal in 2024

* ✅I separated myself from people and things that triggered me.

* ✅I stopped blaming people who wronged me and forgave them.

* ✅I bought myself a promise ring and made a very detailed list of promises and boundaries I have to stand on.

* ✅I bought so many books about wellness and life. (I look at things so differently now.

* ✅I got in the gym and changed my eating habits.

* ✅I made a goals list with detailed steps and dates

* ✅I got an EMS dog 🐕 so that I don't get triggered about being lonely and fall into depression or go back to unhealthy people.

* ✅I took the necessary steps to get help so now I have a psychiatrist and a therapist (the best decision ever)

* ✅I do things I enjoy even if it's alone.

* ✅I'm working on being a better friend, daughter, sister, cousin, niece, etc. Because going through depression I detached myself from the world.

* ✅I'm getting closer to God

* ✅Enjoying life and learning to live in the moment and not my past.

* ✅I don't let things easily upset me I laugh it off and create a better day.

This is still all new to me and I'm still learning and growing to be strong I'm not going to be perfect overnight. I know I'm not the only one and hopefully some of us can grow together!!! LETS LOVE OURSELVES♡♡♡♡♡♡

#healing #shareyourthoughts #storytime #whatsinmybag #introducingmyself #selfcare #amazonfinds #instagram #Lemon8Diary

#grwm