How to Tell If They Love You, Not Your Money
We’ve all seen it (or lived it): the person who showers you in attention… but only when you’re paying, providing, or giving. So how do you know if they actually love you your mind, your heart, your soul or if they just love what you do for them? 🎯
This is such a vital convo, especially if you’ve ever been the “giver” type (hi, me 🥲). So let’s talk about the little green flags vs red flags that say, “I love YOU,” versus “I love what you offer.”
✨ Do they show up when you have nothing to give?
When you’re broke, burnt out, sick, anxious, or just not in a giving mood do they still call? Do they still want to be around you when the cards, gifts, and support stop flowing? If the vibe shifts once you’re not “useful,” that’s a massive 🚩.
✨ Do they give back without being asked?
Someone who truly cares about YOU will find ways to return the energy. It doesn’t have to be big, expensive, or flashy. It’s the little things: a thoughtful text, remembering your favorite snack, offering to pay for gas, checking in on your mental health. Love is shown in effort, not dollar signs.
✨ Do they treat you the same in public AND private?
Pay attention to whether they only act sweet and grateful when it benefits their image. If they brag about what you do for them but never appreciate you privately? That’s performative. Genuine love is consistent whether you’re alone or around a crowd.
✨ Do they know YOU, or just what you give?
Ask yourself: “Would they still want me around if I couldn’t give them money, rides, clout, comfort, or constant help?” If they don’t care to learn about your dreams, your triggers, your real self… that’s a HUGE sign they’re in it for gain, not connection.
✨ How do they react to boundaries?
Try saying “no” to something. See what happens. If the vibe turns cold, if they guilt-trip you, if they start pulling away or lashing out that’s because their love was conditional. A real one will respect your limits, not punish you for having them 💅🏻
You deserve to be loved because of who you are not what you can offer. You’re not a walking wallet, therapist, or convenience store. You are a whole human with value beyond what you give. And guess what? The right people will never make you feel like you’re only loved when you’re useful 💗
💬 Have you ever felt used in a relationship or friendship? Have you ever wondered if someone would stick around if you had nothing to offer? Let’s talk about it below I’m building a space where we can all share openly and support each other like a squad 🫶🏻
I’m endlessly thankful for every single person who reads my content or supports what I do. The more you hype me up, the more I can create things that empower us all. I post every day on every platform and I’m truly here to grow a loving, kind, and respectful community where we ALL feel safe, understood, and seen ✨
Help me hit 2K on Lemon8 and let’s keep this movement going 💕
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In today's fast-paced world, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and unsure about the intentions of those around us, especially in romantic relationships. How do we navigate the complexities of love when financial dynamics are involved? The key lies in recognizing specific behaviors that can help illuminate a partner's true feelings. One critical aspect to observe is how partners react during challenging times. If someone truly loves you, they will support you not just in good times, but also when you face difficulties. This includes emotional and financial hardships. Genuine love means standing by each other regardless of external circumstances. Another crucial red flag to watch for is how a partner respects your boundaries. Relationships should be built on mutual respect and understanding, where both partners feel safe to express their limits without fear of retaliation or guilt-tripping. If setting a boundary results in negative behavior or emotional withdrawal, it may indicate a relationship based on conditions rather than unconditional love. Furthermore, true affection is often demonstrated through small acts of kindness and attention rather than grand gestures or significant monetary contributions. Thoughtful surprises, checking in on your well-being, or simply spending time together can speak volumes about the depth of their feelings. It's vital to engage in open communication, allowing both partners to express their needs and concerns without fear of judgment. Using tools like relationship check-ins can help create a safe space for discussing feelings about love and support without any monetary aspects suffocating the conversation. Lastly, it’s essential to remember our self-worth and understand that we deserve love for who we are, not for what we can provide. Create boundaries, promote open dialogue, and observe their actions closely. This clarity can make a significant difference in finding a partner who values you beyond material gain.
I was in this kind of relationship for 10 mo 21,000.00$ later lesson learned :(