#arkansas #guatemalanfamily #mayanlove #familydynamicsmatter #understanding #empathetic #nativefamily #theraputic #familythings #browngirlvibes #toyotahighlander #thoughts #foryou #parati Just been super busy prepping for this baby’s arrival & deep thinking on my life in the past. I’m so glad I have those, who I want to be apart of my life, in my life. Looking back, I was a jerk to a few of my family members & they didn’t deserve it but I now see what my problems were… Most of the time, it had nothing to do with them. Finishing my teen years in a toxic environment from a secret adoption then to be given the chance to reconnect with the side of my family that raised me first, as I turned 18, is truly a blessing. Healing from everything that was taken away from me & forced onto me was very hard to do. Sometimes, I feel like it’s still not over but the worst of the storm has passed. I’m glad that I have a strong bond with my dad & always have even in separation. Becoming a parent has definitely been an eye opener in these first 10 months of preparing for my baby’s arrival. There’s a lot of things that went wrong as I grew up but I’m very happy to have survived it all so I know how to prevent it from happening to my own child. I’m not saying my family is perfect bc like any other family, we have our very sour apples - that I don’t hesitate to call out bc they lack some serious accountability. But I do stay in the mix of my family that is empathetic/humbled/quick to help out bc that’s something I seen a lot on both sides that has always stuck to me. Being pregnant is seriously an eye opener bc it shows you who really cares about you & who doesn’t. Not everyone on my dad’s side supports me & I am totally fine with that bc it’s the same people who just aren’t good people in my eyes. I don’t need their support bc ultimately, it’s just a form of spying for their own self gratification & I don’t have time to indulge into that type of toxicity. I also was not around a lot of them to even consider them to be close to me. Like I said, my dad’s family is not perfect in any way but I am happy with who supports me & happy with who doesn’t bc at the end of the day, I have my dad & his little sister. My dad was a great parent to me when he had custody of me. A lot of what he had taught me stuck with me even through the adoption. I always say this: the culture shock was so real after the adoption bc I was Latina first then forced to be something I wasn’t. My tia was a literal child helping my dad raise us girls & I will always look up to her as a mother figure bc she stepped up when my mom stepped away. She is only 9 years older than me. Both my dad & my Tia became 1st time grandparents this year - from their own children. I am so excited to be raising my baby with my cousin & her baby, having the support we have from our parents, & both given an opportunity to become parents ourselves. I finally am about to get to hold my baby & the thought of that makes me emotional in a really good way. ♥️ (My man is definitely still in the picture, this post is just dedicated to my dad & his family.)
Healing from complicated family dynamics, especially those involving adoption and cultural shifts, is a journey that requires empathy, understanding, and resilience. This narrative highlights the significance of acknowledging personal faults without burning bridges with supportive family members, emphasizing forgiveness and the power of reconciliation. The author’s experience of navigating a toxic upbringing and secret adoption reveals the critical role of reconnecting with one’s roots to foster identity and belonging. Pregnancy often serves as a transformative period where the true nature of relationships becomes clearer. It exposes who genuinely cares and who may harbor less supportive intentions, enabling individuals to set healthier boundaries for the well-being of themselves and their future children. The author's reflections demonstrate the importance of surrounding oneself with empathetic and humble family members who offer unconditional support. Moreover, the experience of raising a child in a multicultural environment, particularly one that bridges Latina heritage and other familial influences, showcases the challenges of cultural identity and adaptation. The presence of nurturing figures, like the author’s tia who stepped in as a mother figure, illustrates how extended family members contribute essential support in parenting and cultural preservation. Understanding family dynamics involves recognizing that no family is without flaws; accountability and communication are key to managing conflicts. The story advocates for focusing on the supportive 'mix' of family rather than dwelling on 'sour apples,' which helps to maintain emotional health and foster loving relationships. This journey also underscores the joy and emotional impact of becoming a parent and preparing for a baby’s arrival. With the support of loved ones and a clear sense of self-awareness, the author is poised to break negative cycles and create a nurturing environment for the next generation. This narrative offers valuable insights for others dealing with complex family situations, emphasizing healing, empathy, and the strength found in supportive relationships.
