My ex is so manipulative!! 😡😡
Context: My bf broke up with me on 15 Oct and started dating another girl on 19 Oct.
Back in Dec 2022, he asked me inappropriate and uncomfortable questions even though he already had a girlfriend.
At that time, I really loved him a lot and believed every single word he said.
I couldn’t accept the fact that he had a girlfriend, so I started texting him.
Surprisingly, he told me that I could be his girlfriend if I managed to “win his heart.”
He gave me a few days to do so, and since I was head over 👠 for him, I tried my best to text and impress him.
After a few days, he told me that he already had a girlfriend.
Wtf! I wasted my time texting him only to hear that he already had a girlfriend. 😡
On 15 Oct 2025, I asked him again why he had asked me those inappropriate questions back then when he had a gf.
He got mad and blamed me, saying he didn’t have a girlfriend at that time.
But in Aug 2022, he had already reposted his gf ( Now, his ex) on Instagram!
Must I remind him that my memory about him is still very fresh?
Shortly after that conversation, he broke up with me.
Before the breakup, we hadn’t seen each other for 3 months due to our conflicting schedules.
He’s in the military, and I work full-time, including weekends, with my rest days on Tue and Fri which means I could only meet him on Fridays.
For 3 months, he kept saying that he was very drained and tired from military life and didn’t want to meet up even on Fri.
Me being an overthinker, I suspected he had someone else.
On 10 Oct, I asked him about it because I saw his side Instagram account tagging another girl and adding a flower emoji beside her username.
He said she was just a friend, that he had lost a bet with her, and that he didn’t have anyone else in mind.
After the breakup, my ex-crush started texting me and reassuring me that everything would be alright.
I told him the whole story, and he said that my ex was manipulative and had been using me since day one.
He also said my ex knew I was uncomfortable when he asked those inappropriate questions, and that if he were me, he wouldn’t stay near such a person because I didn’t give my ex the “excitement” he wanted.
My ex-crush also said my ex used the “in and out” method to make me like him.
When I told my mom about the breakup because I was really affected, she told my relatives and they all scolded and blamed me for being stupid.
I told them I was just blinded by love, but they kept blaming me for choosing him and for being sad about the breakup.
So, what are your thoughts about my ex? 💭
Do you think he’s a manipulative person based on this story?
Dealing with a manipulative partner can be emotionally draining and confusing. Reflecting on my experience, I noticed several key red flags that others might find useful. For example, when my ex asked me uncomfortable questions even though he already had a girlfriend, it made me uneasy, but I ignored this because I was emotionally invested. One tactic he used was giving me false hope by saying I could "win his heart," only to reveal later that he had no intention of ending his previous relationship. This kind of emotional bait and switch is a classic sign of manipulation designed to keep someone hooked and uncertain. Another behavior that stood out was his inconsistent communication and excuses about being too tired to meet, which made me suspect he was seeing someone else. When I confronted him, he denied everything, trying to gaslight me into doubting my own observations. From my ordeal, I learned the importance of trusting your instincts and setting boundaries early. Manipulative people often use charm and confusion to control their partners, so keeping a support system of friends or family to get perspective can be invaluable. If you find yourself in a similar situation, remember you deserve honesty and respect. Recognize toxic patterns early and don’t be afraid to distance yourself. Manipulation can leave deep emotional scars, but acknowledging it is the first step to healing and finding healthier relationships.
> I couldn't accept the fact that he had a girlfriend, so l started texting him. > Surprisingly, he told me that I could be his girlfriend if I managed to "win his heart." > He gave me a few days to do so, and since I was head over , for him, I tried my best to text and impress him. He cheated on his then gf to be with you, but you’re mad that he’s doing the same thing to someone else? Not victim blaming here, because he’s definitely a red flag, but u must know, if he cheated on his ex, he will probably cheat on you too. How u got him is how u lose him. Next time just stay away from guys with girlfriends.