My favorite ways to support clients through grief outside of session:

When you're navigating the deep waters of grief, it often feels like you're adrift without a compass. In those moments, finding practical tools that can genuinely help you process the overwhelming emotions is a lifeline. I remember feeling so lost after a significant loss, and that's when I discovered the power of intentional grief exercises. They aren't about 'getting over' it, but rather about learning to live with the loss and integrate it into your life in a way that allows for healing. One of the first things I learned is that there's no 'right' way to grieve. This is where the idea of a 'Permission Slip Homework' really resonated with me. Giving myself permission to feel whatever I felt – sadness, anger, numbness, even moments of joy – without judgment was incredibly freeing. It’s a simple but profound step in acknowledging your unique journey. Often, we compare our grief to others, or to societal expectations, and this exercise gently reminds us that our feelings are valid, and our pace is our own. It truly helps reduce self-judgment and supports authentic healing. Another powerful approach I've personally benefited from is the 'Two Truths Reminder.' Grief isn't linear, and conflicting emotions often coexist. You can feel utterly devastated one moment and find a small flicker of peace the next. This exercise, where you write down two seemingly contradictory truths, helps practice dialectical thinking. For example, 'I miss them terribly' and 'I am grateful for the memories we shared.' Acknowledging both allows for a more holistic processing of emotions and builds self-compassion. It teaches you to tolerate uncomfortable feelings without trying to suppress them. For those unspoken thoughts and feelings, the 'Letter to the Person (Unsent)' is an incredibly cathartic experience. It creates a safe space to express everything you wish you could say – your regrets, your gratitude, what you miss most. There’s no pressure to share it; the act of writing itself is the release. It’s a way to continue processing unresolved emotions and maintain a connection, even after they're gone. I found it helped me externalize my feelings and gain clarity on what I truly needed to say. Beyond these, engaging in a 'Continuing Bonds Ritual' can be immensely comforting. Choosing a small, tangible way to remember or honor the person you've lost, whether it's lighting a candle, playing their favorite song, or cooking a meal they loved, provides a gentle reminder of their presence in your life. These small acts help honor the relationship and can be a source of solace outside of formal sessions. It’s about finding small ways to keep their memory alive and integrated into your daily life. And because grief comes in waves, having a 'Grief Wave Plan' ready is crucial. Identifying 3 grounding skills, 2 people to reach out to, and 1 comfort activity helps you prepare for those intense moments before they hit. It gives you a sense of control and a practical toolkit to navigate emotional surges more safely. It's about proactive self-care. Finally, the 'Grief Check-In Journal' is a simple yet profound daily practice. Taking a few moments each day to note what emotion showed up, where you felt it in your body, and what you needed most, normalizes the fluctuating nature of grief. It teaches you that grief isn’t a straight line to be 'finished,' but rather a journey with its own cycles. This daily reflection offers insights into your emotional landscape and helps you understand your needs better. These grief exercises aren't magic cures, but they are powerful tools for self-compassion, processing, and healing. They empower you to take an active role in your grief journey, providing structure and support when you need it most. Experiment with them, adapt them to your own needs, and remember that every step you take towards acknowledging and processing your loss is a step towards healing.