I wished people told me before becoming a parent‼️

There’s no right way to parent. Despite all of the books, podcasts, social media posts and unsolicited advice from cousins, coworkers or neighbors that tell you otherwise, the best way to parent is whatever way works BEST FOR YOU.

1. Parenthood is like a roller coaster ride:

It can multiple emotions when being a parent. you can feel fulfillment, joyful, fruustrated and exhausted all at the same time. And that’s NORMAL. Parenthood isn’t all good or all bad, all exhausting or all energizing, all happy or all sad. You often may experience different, and potentially contradicting emotions along the way. For example, you might feel like you love a certain stage of parenthood and also want it to pass.

2. There are many resources:

Being a parent involves accessing a variety of resources to support both the parent and child. They are many ways to get help or information. it can be:

- Educational Material like books, courses and workshops.

- Healthcare Services like family doctors and mental health professionals.

- Support Network like family and friends, parenting groups, and professional support.

- Educational Institutions like the local schools, teachers, and special needs advisors.

- Financial Resources, Legal Resources, Community Services, and local Libraries to help with any documents dealing with children.

These resources can help parents navigate the challenges of raising children and provide a supportive environment for their growth and development.

3. Nothing Lasts Forever. Every Stage of Parenthood Is Temporary:

Every season of parenthood is like a new season. The first one (thr fourth trimester) may feel overwhelming. Lack of sleep and new roles and responsibilities all contribute to uncertain emotions. Know that these feelings are usually temporary.

The other side of it is that it can go by so quickly. The joys of parenting don’t stop at a certain age. When you recognize the temporary nature of different stages, it can help lighten stress when it feels hard and boost joy when it’s wonderful.

4. Parenthood can be a lonely experience:

Social media has its perks, but many new parents feel like they’re surrounded by images of ‘the perfect mother/father’ or that they’re the only ones struggling to adjust to their new life. I promise, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

5. Every parent is different:

Your identity can shift a lot when you become a parent—and that’s not a bad thing, But it’s something that often causes stress and anxiety in new parents. Being different, have different values, and aspirations would shift after having children. After starting a family, aspirations changed to accommodate the families new reality. Having a baby is a major life transition, so change is unavoidable. Be proud of your ability to adapt, and give yourself all the grace and compassion you deserve.

You can still be your own person, and there are people who feel like their identity doesn’t change at all. For instance, if you’re ambitious and career-driven now, you can still be that person once your baby is here. And you can still enjoy the things you enjoyed pre-baby. For every person who feels like their identity shifted when they became a parent, they also maintained their identity. No two people or pregnancies are alike, and both sides of the coin are normal.

6. Mental Health Conditions Are normal:

Perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs) like postpartum depression (PPD) or postpartum anxiety (PPA) are extremely common. Treatment is different for everyone and may involve increased self care, support groups, talk therapy or medication. The most important thing to know is that you don’t need to suffer, and you don’t need a diagnosis to reach out for support.

If you ever feel like irritability, anxiety, sadness or overwhelm are getting in the way of your ability to care for yourself or your baby, talk to your healthcare provider. You can also call or text the PSI Help Line anytime at 1-800-944-4773.

7. Ask for Help if necessary.

Multiple parents we talked to said looking back, they wish they’d asked for more help, especially during the newborn phase. What’s truly helpful depends on the person, but here are a few topics to consider:

Sleep: Ask a friend or family member to come over every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon (or whenever you prefer) so you can nap.

Nutrition: Text someone a grocery list and ask them to drop off food.

Time for yourself: Ask someone to come sit with the baby for an hour while you take a walk or a long shower. And communicate your needs with a partner to ensure you both have time for yourselves.

Household chores: An extra set of hands to do laundry, dishes or tidy up around the house—whether it’s someone in your support network or paid help—can be invaluable postpartum.

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