How to make friends in college (as an introvert) 🫶

Starting college, I, like many introverts, thought finding friends meant joining every club related to my hobbies. I eagerly signed up for the photography club (just like the person taking a photo with a smartphone in an image I saw), a creative writing group, and even a hiking club, hoping that shared interests would be the magic key to instant friendships. While these were great places to meet people, I quickly realized it wasn't always that simple. For introverts, the initial hurdle of finding friends with similar interests can actually be a fantastic starting point. Where do you even begin? I found that campus involvement fairs at the beginning of the semester are goldmines. They list every club imaginable, from board game societies to departmental study groups. Don't be afraid to sign up for email lists for a few that genuinely pique your interest. Beyond that, university online forums or dedicated student social media groups can sometimes highlight events or informal meetups centered around specific hobbies. Even just attending a guest lecture on a topic you love can put you in a room with like-minded individuals. However, what I learned was that just sharing an interest wasn't enough, especially for me. I met people who loved kayaking (like the image of people on a serene lake) just as much as I did, but their social energy was completely different. They thrived on constant conversation and high-energy outings, while I craved quieter, more reflective interactions. I'd feel drained after just an hour, even if we were doing something fun together. That's when I realized the profound importance of what the article calls 'similar energy.' So, how do you identify 'similar energy' once you've found someone with a shared interest? For me, it often came down to observing how they socialized and the rhythm of our interactions. Did they appreciate comfortable silences during a shared activity, or did they feel compelled to fill every quiet moment? Did they seem content with a low-key hangout, like grabbing coffee or studying together, rather than always needing to be at a loud party? My best connections, my 'anchor friends,' weren't necessarily the ones with identical hobbies, but those I could simply be with – like those two young women sitting comfortably on a beach at sunset. We could share a coffee, study side-by-side in comfortable silence, or chat for hours without either of us feeling exhausted or pressured. Even within interest groups, you can apply the 'micro-interactions' strategy. Instead of forcing deep conversations right away, I'd make eye contact, offer a genuine smile, or make a brief, relevant comment about the activity we were doing. These small, consistent gestures, much like the women smiling for a selfie, gradually built familiarity without overwhelming me or others. It helped me gauge if there was a compatible 'vibe' before investing too much social energy. If those small interactions felt easy and unforced, it was a good sign there might be a deeper, more sustainable connection brewing. Ultimately, while starting with shared interests is an excellent way to meet new people in college, remember to listen to your introvert self. Prioritize finding friends whose energy truly complements yours. It’s about building those sustainable connections where you feel recharged, understood, and genuinely comfortable, not drained. That's the real secret to thriving socially as an introvert in college.