The Noise I Miss is the Quiet I Needed 🤧
As a mom to a child with autism, most of my day is managing overstimulation. Both hers and my own. The constant talking/noises, asking questions, persistent demands, etc. leave me completely drained by noon. I honestly am constantly counting down the hours until I can finally get a break.
But then she leaves.
I can finally have room to think and breathe on my own. I can finish household chores in a fraction of the time. I can sit down and watch an episode of my own tv show and actually understand what’s happening. It’s the only time my nervous system has a time to slow down.
But somehow, that’s when I miss her the most. It’s a strange feeling being grateful for peace while simultaneously feeling guilty for ever hoping for the break in the first place.
If you’re a parent who has felt this way, and the guilt that comes with it, you are NOT alone 🌺
#anxietyinmotherhood #autism #overstimulation #overstimulatedmoms #momguilt
Living with overstimulation daily, especially as a parent to a child with autism, is an emotionally and physically exhausting experience. The constant barrage of noises, questions, and demands can leave one feeling drained and overwhelmed by midday, creating a deep longing for quiet moments. However, the silence that finally comes when the child leaves can stir a confusing mix of relief and guilt. From my own experience, these quiet moments are essential for resetting my nervous system and regaining clarity. I’ve learned that taking this time to breathe and recharge isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. It allows me to be a more present and patient caregiver when my child returns. I use this break to catch up on chores quickly or indulge in simple pleasures, like watching a favorite TV show without distraction, which helps restore my mental energy. Those moments of silence also bring an unexpected wave of missing my child, despite the exhaustion caused by overstimulation. It reminds me that love and the need for rest can coexist, even if the feelings seem contradictory. This duality is common among parents navigating the challenges of autism and sensory overload; feeling overwhelmed and loving your child deeply at the same time is normal. Connecting with other parents who understand these emotions can be profoundly comforting. Sharing about mom guilt, anxiety in motherhood, and overstimulation creates a supportive community and validates these complex feelings. If you find yourself counting down to a break and then missing the quiet once it arrives, know that you’re not alone, and these emotions are part of the broader journey of caregiving with compassion and resilience.
