Tell me what super old teen drama show you keep binge watching and I’ll read you to filth (just jokes🫶🏻) didn’t see yours? Lmk and I’ll drag you personally 💅🏻

🏀 One Tree Hill: Most of your life is simply going to and fro from a handful of locations and you're beginning to feel like a sim. You’re still listening to indie hipster folk music from your youth that has an aggressive amount of clapping and stomping punctuated by shouts and you like the idea of a small town for the community aspect and lack of traffic but not the remoteness that would severely limit your overnight shipping and live event options. You’re also not cleaning out your reusable water bottle nearly as often as you should be.

📺 Dawson's Creek: You're at the age where you're considering donning undergarments that could be called hosiery and you’re very fond of using $1,000 words in $5 conversations, which totally makes you like super intellectual. You think therapy won’t “work on you because you know what they’re doing” and you’re one of those people that will not stop mentioning how your skinny jeans will need to be pried out of your cold lifeless hands. Wear whatever you want to pick up your kids up from school babe, I promise you have all of our support.

🧛 True Bleh: There's a side of your personality that has long been dormant but you're beginning to feel it stir like an ancient, hungry eldritch being who has heard whispers of something called Taco Bell. You had an incredibly eventful few years and now you usually want a very stable and predictable, almost boring life but every once in a while you think about making some phone calls to your past that you absolutely should not make. You also either can’t take anything seriously or you take absolutely everything extremely seriously, you’re like a bad corset, you either need to tighten up or loosen up.

🔍 Veronica Mars: You haven't told anyone because you know how it would sound but you're concerned you may be stuck in a time loop or that you recently ingested some particularly potent fungus without your consent. You know you’re walking a razor thin line between being safe and paranoid and you could teach a masterclass in subtext that would help a whole lot of people like me out more than you know. At some point you’ve associated with the phrase “fluent in sarcasm” but you realized it was cringe and have distanced yourself. Right? (head tilt look)

🦸 Smallville: You're in this weird stage of life where you're absolutely a responsible adult but you don't want wear the clothing of a responsible adult. Like by all metrics you’re successful, productive, and due all diligence but you’re not ready to stop wearing short skirts or stop listening to new music. Like society is demanding you slink off into invisible irrelevance in a mumu with only a podcast about “doing hard things and being a brave, uncomfortable middle aged woman” and you just CAN NOT comply with that. You’re also one of those people that doesn’t ask for help but not because you feel guilty or anything it’s because you genuinely don’t trust anyone else to do it correctly and I just want you to feel justified in that choice, queen.

#millennial #comfortshow #90s #2000s #whatyourfavoritesaysaboutyou