Blood, Bells, and Boundaries -The Cost of “I Do”
Desserted island or
just the hills and valleys of my mind
to give him
admission, permission
what's the mission?
my vast wide open mind lile an ocean,
Troubling waters
violent nights
Calm waves
Sinking ,falling
walking, wondering
alone I trave
a second island in the distance
murderous, harmful, scary
unstable, undecided
Clashing, crashing
his island eats mine whole
when can I be heard?
Marriage, wedding bells.
Every girls dreams right?
To find true love?
Prince charming
being whisked away
What about the Fear?
Love so hard
mind, body, soul
Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded hustand?
Do I?
the family issues
problems arising
trauma surprising
But love that consumes one
Inside and out
Lights a fire a fury so big
Might seem like anger…
To want to take you a way
Give you peace and serenity
Yet you run back like a moth
to the scolding flame
Love so hard
Soul, mind, body
To have each otner to hold for better or for worse through sickness or heath, richer or poorer?
my body shakes
my mind left awake
work, stress, bills
Why can’t I escape?
Is this fate?
My love for you pushes me through
Yet fear sets in my heart
Are you working too?
If I say I do
Do you promise to stick around?
to not leave when you see a cloud?
to not run when your family get too loud?
To keep that gentle hush of heaven?
When they come knocking…
Will you guard our peace
or hand over the keys?
Will you let the past unpack its bags,
extend the lease
on all that grief?
When mama calls
with guilt laced in grace
voice sugar-wrapped but sharp in the face —
Will you answer?
When daddy dials,
half bottle deep,
mad at the world,
spitting storms through the speaker piece
Will you answer?
When brother breaks,
sister shakes,
and the storm in their chest
starts swallowing their days
Will you throw your back into their pain,
load up the truck,
play savior again?
Or will you pause…
not in hate,
not in spite,
but in love
for the life we’re trying to write?
Will you say:
“Not this time.
Not at the cost of mine.”
Will you cradle the calm we built
even if their rain starts to guilt?
Cause I don’t need a hero
who forgets their own name
trying to carry someone else’s flame.
I need you whole.
Soft but bold.
Loving them
but not losing your soul.
Bloods thicker than water
Yet your blood boils and pools
I don’t have the right tools
To help with how cruel family can be
Yet you choose to fuel the fire
So I write this as an apology
In advance
For my hesitance
when I to say “I do.”
© Zaria Montgomery 2025. All rights reserved for works created by Zaria Montgomery. Additional credits are noted where applicable.
Marriage is often idealized as a dream come true, yet it can introduce complex challenges that test even the strongest bonds. Many individuals enter into wedlock filled with hopes of a fairytale romance, only to discover that reality presents conflicts tied to family dynamics and personal commitment. The pressures from family expectations can weigh heavily on a couple, creating an emotional battlefield where one must navigate love and loyalty. Issues such as prioritizing a partner's mental well-being against familial demands can lead to significant personal turmoil. Moreover, the anxiety of maintaining one's individuality amid the union often leads to a state of unrest. Couples may face panic about their roles, obligations, and the potential loss of their identities within the marriage framework. Hence, the never-ending cycle of love and fear captures the essence of commitment, where one must be prepared to confront their past and their partner's family background. A deeper consideration of marriage includes understanding how each partner’s history and family traditions impact their relationship. A relationship thrives when both partners commit not just to each other but also to protecting their sanctuary from external pressures. They must work together to cultivate mutual respect, understanding, and clear boundaries, essential for navigating family ties while preserving their bond. In essence, acknowledging these challenges is vital for couples looking to sustain a balanced and healthy relationship. Understanding that love must coexist with self-preservation can prove crucial, as harmony within the couple often translates to resilience against outside forces, allowing for a more profound, lasting connection.
