The 1-1-1-1 rule for your marriage 🔥❤️🔥❤️
How do you feel about #1 or #3 ?
We love the 2-2-2 rule for marriage but we love the “1-1-1-1 rule” we made up even more 🙌
(Not literally a “rule”)
We believe that to keep your marriage passionate you have invest time, money, and intention into it. It took us almost 15 years to learn this!!
When we started implementing weekly intentional date nights, and quality time EVERY single night, even while raising our 4 kids, our marriage completely changed. ❤️❤️
When we started putting our marriage as a higher priority and saving money for vacations (which takes sacrifice) our marriage changed. Doesn’t have to cost a lot. Date night can be at home after kids are asleep ❤️
And we will probably get crap for this one but keeping sexual intimacy alive and prioritized even when our marriage was truly suffering, we believe kept us together. We both fully believe this! An intimate marriage is what we ALL signed up for right?
Sexual intimacy can be the glue to a marriage when it is hurting (as long as the marriage is respectable and faithful) and now we see how important it is for BOTH people to initiate being intimate.
This shows effort, intention, and desire to the spouse with the higher drive.
If you love your marriage, put your marriage first! If you can implement the 1-1-1-1, watch your marriage go from surviving to thriving!
If you missed the link to the intimate challenge, or the list of 50 home dates that are 🔥🔥grab both in our bio link!
More resources to help your marriage:
1. 📱Download the ultimate intimacy app 🔥 for FREE in the apple and amazon app stores
2. 🎁shop.ultimateintimacy.com for courses, resources and intimate products
3. 🎙️Ultimate Intimacy Podcast available on apple, spotify and amazon podcasts
And don’t forget to let us know how you feel about #1 on the list! Curious to your thoughts on this ❤️
Hey everyone! I wanted to dive a bit deeper into this '1-1-1-1 rule' that has genuinely transformed my own marriage. It sounds rigid, right? But honestly, it's more of a loving commitment we made to each other to keep our connection vibrant, especially after years together and navigating parenthood. Let's break down what each '1' truly means for us and how you can adapt it for your relationship. First, 'Each person initiates being intimate one time per week.' This one might raise eyebrows, but it’s a game-changer. It’s not about pressure; it’s about both partners feeling desired and taking ownership of that spark. For so long, I felt like it was always one of us initiating, leading to resentment and feeling unappreciated. When we committed to this, it suddenly felt like a shared responsibility, a way to show we still find each other attractive and important. It opens up conversations and helps us stay physically connected, which, for us, truly acts as a glue for our emotional bond when things get tough. Next, 'One date night every week!' This doesn't mean expensive dinners out every single time. Our best date nights are often at home after the kids are asleep. We might cook a simple meal together, light candles, play a board game, or just sit and talk without distractions. It's about carving out that dedicated time, just the two of us, to reconnect as a couple, not just co-parents or housemates. It reminds us of who we were before all the responsibilities took over. Sometimes, it's just a coffee shop visit, but the key is that consistent, intentional connection. Then there's 'One hour every night to connect.' This is probably my favorite and the easiest to implement. It’s our designated screen-free time. We've found that doing something simple like a quick walk, reading side-by-side, or even just talking while getting ready for bed makes a huge difference. The OCR mentions 'shower together, talk, snuggle, etc.' and that's exactly it! It’s about being present with each other, sharing our day, our thoughts, and just enjoying each other's quiet company. It builds intimacy in the everyday moments. This daily check-in stops small issues from becoming big ones and makes us feel like we're truly a team. And finally, 'One vacation together without our kids once a year.' I know, this sounds like a luxury, but it doesn’t have to be a lavish trip to Hawaii. It could be a weekend getaway to a nearby town, staying at a bed and breakfast, or even just a night at a hotel in your own city. The goal is to completely step away from your daily routine and responsibilities, especially parenting, to remember each other as individuals and partners. My husband and I save up for this, and honestly, the anticipation alone strengthens our bond. It allows us to recharge and come back to our family feeling refreshed and even more connected. Implementing these 'ones' isn't always easy, life gets busy! But treating them as non-negotiable appointments, just like work meetings, has been crucial. It truly shifts your marriage from just surviving the daily grind to actively thriving and growing together. What do you think about these points? Have you tried anything similar?















































































































🍋🍋🍋 🔥 One DATE Night per Week, is a must have. It'll feel wanted/needed/and a SPLURGE to everyday mundane ROUTINES🔥🍋🍋🍋