Been a year
Last year at this time, I was fighting so hard to hold on to this gay relationship I thought would last forever. I believed you would stay, no matter what. But nah…
What hurt wasn’t that you stopped loving me… it was that you gave me hopewhile you were already preparing to leave (idk since when). You were ready to go, and I wasn’t.
I kept holding on that time, going through waves of emotions again and again.. hurting myself and hurting you too.. and i know that’s not me anymore.
A year later, with the love and support of my family and friends, i am slowly getting better. Still learning how to live without you…. Living my own life.. loving myself..
I miss us sometimes. I still look back at all the memories of us.. and they still bring tears. But I’ve learned to accept that the version of you I loved
no longer exists. Like is dead, cause he’s no longer in your body.. I know it sounds quite stupid for me to be looking at things this way..
And yes… I still feel sad during those quiet moments. Because what I felt for you was real. If it wasn’t real, I wouldn’t have lost myself when I lost you… someone who meant so much to me.
我很好，你好吗？😢
The healing journey is tough… but I’m grateful for ppl who were here with me…
