THIS BOOK IS GONNA STAY ON MY MIND😭
This book reflects the reality many families are still facing today. It started off a little slow for me, but everything eventually comes together and makes it all worth it. The story explores how in many black households, we’re taught “what goes on in this house stays in this house” and how detrimental that mindset can be, continuing cycles of GENERATIONAL TRAUMA.
I appreciated how much the book highlights the lack of media coverage when people of color go missing—an issue that still exists today. For example, Jelani Day went missing around the same time as Gabby Petito, if not earlier, yet received nowhere near the same media attention and the list goes on.
The twist Sasha revealed was only partly shocking, since what happened was always a possibility—it was just heavily speculated based on timing. I wish we had learned more about the father’s shift from loving to abusive, which I just assumed may have been linked to CTE🤷🏾♀️. While the mother was also a victim to an extent, she often seemed to enable his behavior by dismissing the children’s feelings which made me side eye her just as much!! 😒
Reading 'We Don't Talk About Carol' truly resonated with me, especially as it highlights the often unspoken pain within Black households where secrecy can fuel ongoing cycles of trauma. Growing up, I experienced a similar environment where family struggles were brushed under the rug, making it challenging to heal and communicate openly. What struck me most was the novel’s emphasis on the disparity in media coverage surrounding missing persons. The contrast between the attention given to cases like Gabby Petito's versus missing people of color such as Jelani Day is a harsh reality that remains largely unaddressed. This discrepancy not only impacts public awareness but also affects the resources devoted to these cases. The characters’ dynamics, especially the father's transformation from loving to abusive, reminded me of the complex effects that traumatic brain injuries like CTE can have on behavior, which is rarely discussed in family contexts. The mother's role as an enabler further complicates the family system, reflecting how trauma can distort relationships and survival mechanisms. This novel encouraged me to confront painful truths about silence and denial in families just like mine, and to acknowledge how harmful "what goes on in this house stays in this house" can be. It’s a call to break the silence and prioritize mental health and open dialogue. For anyone seeking a powerful story that combines personal grief with social commentary, this book offers much-needed insight and validates experiences that are often invisible. I highly recommend it for readers who want to understand the intersection of family secrets, systemic neglect, and cultural stigma.