⚠️Is this too harsh of a punishment ? HELP⚠️

So lately my autistic toddler has been having really big issues with behavior and talking rudely to us . We do NOT hit first and talk later .. I don’t even like to pop him. He’s also a big kid, very strong and likes to move his weight around a lot . He’s 3 yes but he’s also 3 ft 6 in, 45 lbs and can push my 230+ lb grandmother around in her wheelchair like it’s nothing ..

Some of the main issues we’ve seen are hitting adults and kids , yelling and screaming at them , throwing toys directly at my disabled grandmother, my mom and his peers at school , spitting , tantrums , growling and screaming matches. We’ve tried everything from talking it out, time out , taking things away , increased therapy and activities , rerouting his schedule and now this standing on the wall with his arms up.. this seems to be the ONLY thing that’s gets through to him.. I hate doing it though because I feel like it’s so harsh ..

What do I do ? I NEED ADVICE . Is this wrong ?!

#autistictoddler #parentingadvice #help #audhd

2025/9/8 Edited to

... Read moreParenting an autistic toddler with strong physical presence and challenging behaviors can be overwhelming, especially when standard discipline methods don’t seem effective. It’s important to remember that autistic children often communicate distress and sensory overload in ways that might look like defiance or rudeness, such as hitting, screaming, or throwing objects, as described in your situation. Understanding the root cause of the behaviors is essential. Consider whether your toddler is experiencing sensory difficulties, frustration due to communication challenges, or emotional overload. Consulting with a behavioral therapist who specializes in autism can help tailor strategies that meet your child’s individual needs. Alternative approaches such as positive reinforcement, visual schedules, and sensory breaks can provide structure and reduce triggers. Instead of punitive measures like standing with arms on the wall, try to redirect his energy with physical activities that allow safe movement, or use calming techniques unique to him such as weighted blankets or deep-pressure hugs. Consistency across caregivers is also crucial to prevent confusion or mixed messages. Since your toddler is physically strong for his age, safety is a real concern for family members, especially your grandmother. Setting clear boundaries and practicing de-escalation techniques will help keep everyone safe. Engaging in parent support groups for families with autistic children can provide shared experiences and new coping strategies. Remember, feeling conflicted about discipline is normal; seeking gentle yet effective methods that maintain your child’s dignity and your family’s well-being is key. Your commitment to exploring options and seeking advice shows great care and a desire to foster positive growth despite the challenges.

46 comments

lemon4610023518's images
lemon4610023518

I’m sorry what ? He throws toys at his grandma 😮I’m sorry just because he’s autistic donset mean he can abuse your mom or your mother in law. And do harsher pusiments take his toys away no tv no ipad. Making him stand with his hands on the walls dose NOTHING! I would get my ass padle if i threw a toy at my grandma and tbh if i was a parent i would do.

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❤️clusion❤️'s images
❤️clusion❤️

Better than me we had to have our hands off the wall

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