Has anyone secretly competed with us?? 🤨

"Who's really competing with us"?

Psychologically, there is a near term, Social Comparison Theory.

(Social Comparison Theory) of Leon Festinger (1954).

Say that humans often compare themselves to others.

To measure one's own value, achievement, or status.

Like when a herd needs to know its hierarchy to survive, only humans use it to measure its value, success, and credibility in society.

The problem is...

Compared to the superior.

There are often feelings of jealousy, pressure, or dissatisfaction in life.

In comparison to the inferior, it may feel superior.

But that kind of happiness is fragile.

So it's like a running game on a field without a finish line. 🏃‍♂️

No matter how fast someone runs, there is always someone who runs ahead.

And turning to look at people who run slower doesn't really heal.

How to notice that someone is "racing" or comparing to us often

There is evidence in research, such as

1. Imitation Behavior

Research has found that when people feel like "competing" or "not wanting to lose,"

He often expresses himself by imitating certain dresses, uses of, or even behaviors, so as not to feel inferior.

Reference source: Chartrand & Bargh (1999)

Chameleon Effect Story - People Will Imitate Each Other Unknowingly

Especially when there is social competition.

2. Attempting Comparison (Upward / Downward Comparison)

If someone often says or shows that they are measuring "who is better than who?"

Like, you bought a new one, and he bought it, too.

Or when you succeed, he'll show you his work.

Reference source: Buunk & Gibbons (2007)

Work on Social Comparison Orientation

3. Mood and energy sent out

Social emotion research says that when competition occurs, there are often non-verbal signs, such as facial expressions, stiffness, not really appreciated, even if the audience is forced, or there is a sense of "jealousy / irritation."

Reference Source: Parrott & Smith (1993) on Envy and Jealousy

4. Monitoring Behavior

People who feel competitive with us tend to "shine" on us more than usual, such as watching our society often, checking where we go, what we do to compare.

Social surveillance research says this kind of behavior is associated with competition and a sense of lack of self-confidence.

Psychological research (Festinger, 1954) points out that

Comparing others all the time makes happiness lower and satisfaction lower in life. Feeling that "we must prevail" is a never-ending trap, because there will always be people who are better, richer, or more beautiful than us.

Many researchers emphasize that people who focus on self-growth are healthier and driven by self-growth.

"Inspiration" is not "fear of intolerance."

🌱 short idea for the heart.

- Race to someone else = endless cycle.

- Race yourself yesterday = real development.

- Happiness is not "above anyone."

But stay at "We are satisfied with what is and what is there."