Do we overvalue our friendships?

I thought loyalty was everything until adulthood hit like a truck. Now, half my crew is MIA after they got married/had kids, one ghosted me after I missed her brunch, and another only vents at 2 AM but never asks about my life.

I know everyone’s busy, but sometimes I wonder that did I set myself up for disappointment by expecting friendships to stay as intense as they were at 18? I’ve cried over canceled plans more than I’d admit, and guilt-tripped myself into over-apologizing when I’m the one feeling ignored. Is this just “how adult friendships work,” or am I holding on to a fantasy?

#letschat #asklemon8 #friendstoenemies

2025/4/16 Edited to

... Read moreFriendships often evolve as life changes, leading many to question if they overvalue these relationships. During our teenage years, friendships are often intense and provide a sense of belonging. However, as adulthood approaches, factors like marriage, parenting, and career pressures can alter these bonds. Many find themselves wondering if their friends have moved on or if they have failed to keep in touch. Understanding that friendships can take different shapes over time is crucial. Adult friendships, while still meaningful, may require a different approach. It’s important to acknowledge that each person’s life stage is unique; therefore, the expectations we set for our friends may need to be adjusted. Instead of viewing canceled plans or less frequent communication as signs of disrespect, it might be more beneficial to see them as part of life’s ebb and flow. Engaging in open conversations about feelings, maintaining connections in simpler ways, like occasional texts or virtual catch-ups, can help keep friendships alive. Embracing change and being flexible might just enhance these relationships despite the challenges that come with adulting.

11 comments

Adah🐚's images
Adah🐚

Adult friendships shift, but your feelings are valid. Focus on friends who reciprocate; new connections can help too.

Related posts

Things I No Longer Entertain As A High Value Woman
MsJakerria

MsJakerria

1946 likes

A person views a framed painting in a museum, with the overlay text "4 BOOKS TO BE A HIGH VALUE WOMEN" in bold red and white, introducing a list of empowering reads.
The book "UNTAMED" by Glennon Doyle is displayed, highlighted for promoting inner knowing, self-trust, courage, and authenticity, described as an awakening for breaking free from expectations.
The book "THE GIFTS OF IMPERFECTION" by Brené Brown is shown, emphasizing self-compassion, vulnerability, worthiness, and wholeheartedness, offering permission to embrace imperfection.
4 books to be a high value women
Hey ladies! 💘 Want to know a secret weapon in my self-discovery journey? Books 📚 Not just any books, but ones that challenge my thoughts, push me out of my comfort zone, ad make me see the world - and myself - in a new light. These pages have become my mentors, my confidants, my cheerleaders.
Meredith Jao

Meredith Jao

1193 likes

A person in a car, with the title 'BECOMING A HIGH-VALUE WOMAN' overlaid, introducing the article's theme.
A person looking out a window, with a text overlay detailing ways to 'be grounded in your femininity,' including embracing vulnerability and not chasing.
Fitness equipment like a yoga mat, headphones, and dumbbell, accompanying text on 'make your health a priority' through whole foods, movement, and routines.
9 WAYS TO BECOME A HIGH VALUE WOMAN
psa: YOU 👏🏻 ALREADY 👏🏻 ARE 👏🏻 A HIGH VALUE WOMAN but this is a guide to developing and expanding on the areas that will turn you into the ✨best✨ possible version of yourself!! 🌷 embrace your femininity ✔️ live with an open heart ✔️ surrender toxic independence ✔️ express yourself creat
carley ◡̈

carley ◡̈

7875 likes

How To Be Unforgettable As A High-Value Woman
Becoming unforgettable isn’t about perfection — it’s about presence. When you know who you are, the world can’t help but remember you. 💎✨ Ready to become that woman? #HighValueWoman #FeminineEnergy #LevelUpJourney #SoftLifeEra #WomenWhoRise
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

89 likes

A notebook page displays a comparison of "WORLDLY FRIENDSHIPS" and "GODLY FRIENDSHIPS" with bullet points. Colorful pens rest on a textured background. The image includes decorative stars and flowers, and a vertical title "WORLDLY VS GODLY FRIENDSHIPS."
WORLDLY VS GODLY FRIENDSHIPS 🌸
🤔 WORLDLY FRIENDSHIPS: - gossip - jealousy - drama & chaos - conditional love - overstepping boundaries - surface level connection - comparison & competition - self focused mindset ✝️ GODLY FRIENDSHIPS: - accountability - encouragement - peace & godly/biblical wi
Ashley 💐🌞✨🫧

Ashley 💐🌞✨🫧

501 likes

HOW TO BECOME A HIGH VALUE WOMAN
Hey girlllls! 💖✨ Today, I want to chat about something super important and close to my heart: becoming a high-value woman. We all have that inner baddie just waiting to shine, and I’m here to help you unleash her! Whether you're on your journey to self-discovery or just need a little boost, I&
Lushie Club 💖

Lushie Club 💖

450 likes

Tough Love From A High-Value Woman
Read this twice before you text him back. Not every man who wants you deserves you—and high-value women don’t confuse attention with intention. 💭✨ If this message stirred something in you, it’s because your intuition is waking up. I go deeper into boundaries, dating with intention, and feminin
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

72 likes

A man from behind, holding a bouquet of red roses, with a woman's hand holding his, illustrating the title '8 Ways that Men Will test you..' in a modern indoor setting.
A man carrying a woman on a sandy beach with the ocean in the background, illustrating the first test: 'he'll test if you respect yourself' and setting boundaries.
A smiling couple enjoying breakfast in bed, illustrating the second test: 'he'll test how much access you'll give for free' without commitment.
8 things he’ll do to see if you value yourself 👀
Sis, every man is going to test you ,not because he doesn’t like you, but because he wants to see if you’ll fold. The real flex is showing up so secure in your worth that no test can shake you. Girl, you don’t prove yourself to him… he proves himself to you. ✨ If you’re ready to become the wo
Soft Cut Society

Soft Cut Society

28 likes

A baby wearing a pink bow and a light blue outfit, with the title "Bible Verses TO PRAY OVER YOUR CHILDREN" overlaid. The Lemon8 logo and username are at the bottom.
A child in a shopping cart holding a cereal box, overlaid with Bible verses 1-5 for protection, wisdom, faith, friendships, and strength. The Lemon8 logo and username are visible.
A child's hands holding an object, overlaid with Bible verses 6-10 for love of God's Word, peace, a servant's heart, God's plans, and gratitude. The Lemon8 logo and username are visible.
Bible Verses to Pray Over Your Children
As parents, one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is the covering of prayer. The Bible reminds us that God’s Word is alive and active (Hebrews 4:12), and when we speak Scripture over our children, we’re inviting God’s promises to work in their lives. Here are some powerful Bible verses
Shelby Evans

Shelby Evans

35 likes

How to be a high value man
Avoid negativity Your goal is to become the most positive person in the room and your actions need to reflect that. Remember your actions affect those around you. Take care of your appearance This one is a little superficial, but with the right clothes and hairstyle, you can look better than
Tony Pablo

Tony Pablo

116 likes

The older I get… the more I value real friendships 🤍
Good friends don’t fix everything… but they make everything easier. #Lemon8 #friendships #motivation
Barbara Asare

Barbara Asare

6 likes

Things I No Longer Do As A High-Value Woman
The moment I stopped betraying myself, everything shifted. High-value energy isn’t about perfection — it’s about prioritizing yourself without guilt. Become HER with me. Your outcome is in the link in my bio…The High-Value Woman Blueprint 💕 Read that again. 💗✨ #HighValueWoman #Feminin
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

49 likes

A stylized image showing numerous doll-like figures or mannequins on and around escalators in a dark, club-like setting, with the title "Build New Friendships" overlaid.
A text-based image titled "HOW TO BUILD RELATIONSHIPS WITH NEW FRIENDS - PT. 1" offering advice on overcoming anxiety and going out to meet people, accompanied by photos of friends laughing and conversing.
A pink graphic titled "HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS IN YOUR TWENTIES" listing nine tips with checkmarks, including working on yourself, finding communities, volunteering, and getting out of the house.
How To Build New Friendships🥂
Good friends bring so many colors of happiness in your life by relieving stress, giving comfort, and removing loneliness. So it never hurts to try to make new friends. Friendships take time, but you can take steps to spark a relationship and nurture a connection. Say yes when they invite you to pla
Angelina

Angelina

438 likes

BECOMING A HIGH VALUE WOMAN
#expensivelifestyle #healing #growth #woman #life #bodytransformation #mentalhealth
zipporahfinds

zipporahfinds

1423 likes

🩸 Do my emotions lose value the second I bleed?🩸
Apparently, the moment I feel anything—annoyed, sad, passionate, alive—it must be “because my period’s coming.” Like, no babe, sometimes I’m just having a human experience. Sure, my hormones do their little rollercoaster thing once a month. I cry at dog videos. I get dramatic over snacks. But it
Ember Athon

Ember Athon

246 likes

How A High-Value Woman Leaves
A high-value woman doesn’t announce her exit. She leaves when the effort stops matching the words. No closure speeches. No begging. No chaos. Just self-respect and silence. Knowing when to walk away is a form of power. ✨ #HighValueWoman #TheHighValueWoman #FemininePower #SelfR
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

73 likes

A stack of aged papers on a dark surface, flanked by two lit candles. The text reads "Metals Power, Value & Devotion" and "Symbolic magic forged through intention," reflecting the article's theme. "The Dark Archive" is at the top.
A stack of aged papers on a dark surface, with two lit candles in the background. The text, titled "Meaning Over Material," states that metals symbolize endurance, structure, and inner worth, emphasizing symbolic value over monetary.
A stack of aged papers on a dark surface, with two lit candles. The text, titled "Devotion, Not Status," describes the magical properties of gold, silver, copper, and iron, highlighting that metal's sacredness comes from intention, not cost.
Metals: Power, Value & Devotion
MAGICAL CORRESPONDENCES: METALS - POWER, VALUE & DEVOTION 🜔✨ Metals have carried meaning since the earliest civilizations. Long before wealth or status, metal symbolized endurance, devotion, and survival. Forged through pressure and heat, metals remind us that strength is not inherited. It is
The Dark Moon Darling

The Dark Moon Darling

24 likes

A woman in a black dress is shown from behind, with text overlayed providing advice on "HOW TO SHOW A MAN you're high-value." The text lists various tips for maintaining self-worth and boundaries in a relationship.
You’re A High Value Woman, Act Like It! 🤌
Being high value means I don’t audition for roles I already own the script to. 🎬👠 #MainCharacter #highvaluewomen #baddiemindset #datingadvice101 Sis, showing him you’re high value doesn’t mean performing. You’re not a circus act 🤡💅🏾. Show up soft, smart, and slightly unavailable. That’s
LucyKevondra

LucyKevondra

1080 likes

A woman smiles while holding a cup, sitting on a yellow couch in a cozy room with bookshelves. Text overlay reads "BOOKS TO BE HIS DREAM GIRL Or you just gotta be a better version of yourself, a high value women EVERYDA."
The book cover for "UNTAMED GLENNON DOYLE" is prominently displayed in a room with bookshelves. Text highlights it as "Raw," "Soul-stirring," "Liberating," and a "Must-read" for breaking free from expectations.
The book cover for "YEAR OF YES SHONDA RHIMES" is on a table with drinks. Text describes it as a "hilarious and inspiring reminder to say YES to opportunities," highlighting it as "Adventurous," "Motivating," and "Eye-opening."
Books to be a high value woman
Ladies, ever felt like you were chasing a mirage of “perfection”? 🙋🏻‍♀️ I sure did. I hustled, I strived, I tried to cram myself into a mold that wasn't even *mine*. It was a recipe for burnout, not brilliance. Then, a few books told a different story. They weren't about being flawless o
Meredith Jao

Meredith Jao

152 likes

HACKS TO TURN CHIT CHATS TO MEANINGFUL FRIENDSHIPS
“why do i meet so many girls but nothing comes out of it?” … the ULTIMATE question i was asking myself as a Miami newbie meeting new girls everyday while out-and-about, sharing our IGs and saying we’d get together sometime, then never talking to them again😫 if you have had the same issue and me
Cassidy

Cassidy

409 likes

An infographic titled '10 Signs You're a High-Value Person' by Sandra Pellumbi, listing characteristics like self-awareness, purpose, and protecting energy. A central illustration depicts a professional woman with dark hair in a blazer, embodying these traits of inner strength and intentionality.
10 Signs You’re High Value
High-value isn’t about money, status, or who notices you. It’s about how you move, how you think, and what you tolerate. When you become self-aware… When you protect your energy… When you walk away from what doesn’t align… That’s when everything in your life upgrades — your relationships, yo
Steven Bou

Steven Bou

238 likes

A tablet displaying text and a white mug, with the overlaid text "books that changed how I think," introducing a series of self-help book recommendations.
The book cover for "The Let Them Theory" by Mel Robbins, a green book with white text, accompanied by the text "Let them... and protect my peace. A reminder to mind my own energy."
The book cover for "The Mountain Is You" by Brianna Wiest, featuring a black cover with gold text and a mountain graphic, with the text "Realizing I'm not stuck. I'm resisting."
Books that genuinely added value to my life 🤍
I’ve been drawn to self-help and psychology books that help me understand my patterns, reactions, and nervous system instead of pushing me to “do more.” Nothing overwhelming. Nothing performative. Just books that made things click over time. Sharing in case you’re in a similar season. #book
Brittany Kiser

Brittany Kiser

479 likes

Habits of high value women👠♥️
Hello Dream Girls!💗🥰 In today's world, where there are many different standards and norms, ✨️it's worth considering what it means to be a high-value woman.🌸 It's not just about outward appearance or career success, but primarily about the values we represent. Here are some traits tha
Angell🤍✨️

Angell🤍✨️

53 likes

A blonde woman in a black dress and boots squats, taking a mirror selfie. Text overlay reads 'HIGH VALUE WOMEN DONT...' in white and red, introducing the article's theme.
A blonde woman with a white flower in her hair, seen from behind, looks at a sailboat. Text states 'they don't seek validation from others ... INSEAD THEY: Prioritize Self Care,' with an explanation.
A blonde woman in a black dress and boots squats, taking a mirror selfie. Text states 'they don't engage in drama ... INSEAD THEY : Cultivate healthy boundaries,' with an explanation.
High-Value Women Don’t….
Let's talk about what high-value women don't do because, trust me, I've learned a thing or two on this journey. THEY DONT — 1.Seek Validation: High-value women don't constantly seek validation from others. They are self-assured and confident in their worth, not relying on exte
juliadorsey

juliadorsey

3136 likes

A woman in a red dress takes a mirror selfie in a bathroom adorned with pink and red artificial roses. The image introduces the topic 'HOW TO BECOME A HIGH VALUE WOMEN'.
An overhead view of various beauty products on a dark surface. Text lists the first tip for high-value women: 'protect your energy' by avoiding oversharing, overexplaining, overstaying, and drama.
A person's legs and feet in black heels stand on a wooden floor, holding a book. The text advises to 'invest in yourself daily' through reading, journaling, discipline, and good habits.
HOW TO BECOME A HIGH VALUE WOMEN ✨
A high value women doesn’t compete, she isn’t loud, she’s gracious, and private. Practicing these will increase your value!
Shes Chelle

Shes Chelle

58 likes

5 Things High Value Women Don’t Do When Dating 🚩
#datingadvice101 #datingadviceforwomen #feminine #softlife #Lemon8
Louis Michelle

Louis Michelle

88 likes

A motivational quote on a muted background reads: "No relationship is ever a waste of time. If it didn't bring you what you want, it taught you what you don't want." The Lemon8 logo and username @thatblkone are at the bottom.
Every Relationship Has Value
Every relationship leaves a mark on our lives, shaping who we are and guiding us toward who we’re meant to be. Sometimes, relationships fulfill our desires, bringing love, joy, and growth. Other times, they challenge us, revealing what doesn’t align with our values or needs. But even in those chall
J

J

692 likes

Me vs. High-Value Me
If you’re in the in-between— outgrowing the old version of you but still learning how to embody the new one— The High-Value Woman Blueprint was created for you. It’s not theory. It’s alignment, boundaries, and confidence you can apply immediately. ✨ Link in bio to step into your next level.
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

48 likes

The Habits of a High Value Woman
Practice these to elevate your life🌹
Irene B

Irene B

959 likes

Knowing My Value vs. Knowing When I’m Not Valued
✨ The difference isn’t loud… it’s how i feel. #valueyourself #LoveYourself #selflove #selfcare #Lemon8
🌟Glow_with_Kia💞

🌟Glow_with_Kia💞

311 likes

An overhead shot shows a person in black pants and sandals with a white pedicure, holding a black quilted handbag. The image features the title "7 Ways To Build High Self Worth As A High Value Woman Luxury Black Girl Edition" and the Lemon8 handle.
A woman in a black lace camisole and white wide-leg pants stands in a modern setting. The text "1. Keep Promises to Yourself" and an explanation about building self-trust are overlaid on the image.
A woman in a white shirt, black suspenders, and wide-leg pants, wearing glasses, leans on a black dress form. The image features the text "2. Raise Your Standards Quietly" and advice on enforcing boundaries.
7 Ways To Build High Self Worth As A High Value ✍🏾
#confidentwoman #Lemon8Diary #highvaluewoman #selflove #selfworthjourney
Louis Michelle

Louis Michelle

348 likes

Signs You’re a High-Value Person
**You know those people who just seem to have it all together?** They're confident, kind, and always seem to be leveling up in life. ✨ Ever wondered what their secret is? Well, it's not about fancy cars or designer bags. It's about something deeper – their *values*. High-value people
Meredith Jao

Meredith Jao

52 likes

5 Ways to Truly Value Yourself
This isn’t surface-level self-love. This is self-respect in action. If this hit a nerve, it’s because you’re ready to move differently. Save it. Reflect. Apply it. #HighValueWoman #DeepHealing #SelfRespect #EmotionalMaturity #InnerWork
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

102 likes

Married To A Narcissist as a High-Value Woman
“Being married to a narcissist will either break you… or awaken you.” If you’re: • Walking on eggshells • Questioning your worth • Silencing yourself to keep the peace • Feeling emotionally drained but still loyal This is your sign. A High-Value Woman doesn’t beg to be respected. She
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

23 likes

5 Things High Value Women Stopped Announcing ✍🏾
#luxuryblackgirl #GirlTalk #Lemon8Diary #highvaluewoman
Louis Michelle

Louis Michelle

134 likes

The Value of True Friendship 🌟
While this was a funny joke my friend played on me, it made me think. Why is it important to have good friends? In the roller coaster of life, friends are the threads that weave joy, comfort, and resilience. Here’s why having good friends matters: Shared Laughter: Good friends bring smiles to o
Keenan Wilson

Keenan Wilson

86 likes

A flat lay of three self-help books: '101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think,' 'Why Men Love Bitches,' and '8 Rules of Love.' The image is captioned 'books I've read for... BECOMING A HIGH VALUE WOMAN.'
A close-up of the book '101 ESSAYS that will CHANGE the way YOU THINK' by Brianna Wiest, a self-help book offering new perspectives on common topics.
A close-up of the book 'WHY MEN LOVE Bitches' by Sherry Argov, described as a guide for women to hold their own in relationships, with over 1 million copies sold.
BOOKS I’VE READ FOR BECOMING A HIGH VALUE WOMAN
As I've been going through my mental health journey and working through my thought process, l've gotten a lot of self-help books. These have helped me reframe the way I think and improve my relationships, with friends, family and significant others. 101 ESSAYS THAT WILL CHANGE THE WAY YO
jenny

jenny

1002 likes

10 Tips High Value Women don’t chase ✍🏾
#luxuryblackgirl #realationshipadvice #luxurygirllifestyle
Louis Michelle

Louis Michelle

738 likes

A woman in a white long-sleeved top, cream midi skirt, and white heels stands outside a building with columns. The image has the overlay text "Becoming A High Value Woman" in pink, introducing the article's theme.
A woman in a red crop top and wide-leg jeans stands outdoors. Overlay text reads "Knows Her Identity," explaining that a high-value woman respects herself, knows her worth, and never compromises her morals.
Two women in stylish outfits take a mirror selfie in front of a concrete wall with greenery. The overlay text "Surrounds Herself With Good Influence" emphasizes the importance of positive social circles for a high-value woman.
Becoming A High Value Woman
Have you ever wanted to become a high-value woman? What does that mean to you? And do you understand the importance of it? I am sharing four different ways you can become a high-value woman in which people look up to and men want to be around a woman like this. It doesn't come down to monetar
Crystal Thomas

Crystal Thomas

20 likes

One Vital Thing To Becoming A High-Value Woman
A woman with self-control is never desperate, never rushed, and never easily accessed. She’s calm because she trusts herself. She’s selective because she values herself. She’s powerful because she’s disciplined. Self-control is the foundation of confidence, boundaries, and emotional securit
The Feminine Blueprint

The Feminine Blueprint

4 likes

See more