Why wait on someone who won’t wait on you
It’s a phrase I’ve heard countless times, and one I often used to dismiss: 'I'm holding out for someone who gets me.' For a long time, I thought it sounded idealistic, maybe even a little naive. In a world that often pressures us to find 'someone' – anyone – it felt easier to just compromise, to settle for a relationship that was 'good enough.' But after a few cycles of trying to make things work with people who just didn't quite see me, I realized that 'good enough' wasn't good enough for my heart. My journey of truly understanding what it means to hold out for someone who gets you began with a lot of self-reflection. I had to #RECognize my own worth and what I genuinely needed in a partner, not just what society told me I should want. It wasn't about a checklist of superficial qualities, but about a deeper connection, a shared understanding that transcends words. It’s about someone who understands your silent cues, celebrates your quirks, and supports your dreams even when they seem far-fetched. There were moments of doubt, for sure. Loneliness can be a powerful motivator to lower your standards. Friends would ask, 'Are you being too picky?' Or suggest, 'Maybe you just need to be more OPEN to different types of people.' And while being open is crucial, there's a difference between being open-minded and being open to settling for less than you deserve. I learned that being open means being vulnerable, sharing your true self, and trusting that the right person will cherish it, not dismiss it. What does it mean, in practice, to hold out? For me, it meant actively disengaging from relationships that felt draining or unfulfilling. It meant spending more time nurturing my own interests, growing as an individual, and becoming the person I wanted to attract. It meant learning to love my own company, so that when someone did come along, they would be an addition to my happiness, not the sole source of it. It also meant having tough conversations with myself about what 'getting me' actually entailed. It's not about finding a clone of myself, but someone who appreciates my unique perspective, challenges me gently, and offers a safe space for me to be my authentic self. It’s about mutual respect, empathy, and a deep emotional resonance. The path hasn't always been easy. There were times I questioned if this 'person who gets me' even existed. But every time I felt that doubt creep in, I reminded myself of the feeling of being misunderstood, of having to constantly explain myself, or feeling like I was walking on eggshells. That feeling was a powerful deterrent against settling. And then, slowly but surely, things started to shift. By being clear about my intentions and what I was truly looking for, I started attracting different kinds of connections. It’s like the universe started to respond to my clarity. I'm not saying it's a magic bullet, but rather a profound shift in mindset that radiates outward. So, if you're out there wondering whether to keep holding out for someone who truly gets you, I want to tell you: it is absolutely worth it. Don't let anyone convince you to settle for less than a soul-deep connection. Your heart deserves someone who sees you, hears you, and loves you for exactly who you are. Trust your intuition, cultivate your inner strength, and stay OPEN to the journey. The wait might be long, but the reward of genuine understanding and connection is immeasurable.
