When Your Ex Trying To Get You Back

2025/1/24 Edited to

... Read moreOkay, so you've seen my post. My ex tried to slide back into my DMs, hit my phone, and honestly? My gut reaction was exactly what you saw in those lyrics: 'I ain't forget sh*t you did.' It's easy to get caught up when an ex suddenly reappears, especially after you've started to heal. You might even start looking for those '3 signs your ex secretly wants you back,' wondering if this time it's different. But let me tell you, sometimes those signs aren't about genuine change; they're about convenience or nostalgia. My ex, for instance, suddenly 'wanna change since I'm gone?' That's a huge red flag. It tells me they only value what they lost, not what they had. They 'explored other options,' thinking the grass was greener. And guess what? It wasn't. Now they want a do-over, but I remember how they made a 'bad decision' to leave in the first place. This isn't about being petty; it's about remembering your worth and the peace you've fought so hard to find. This whole situation brings up some interesting attachment dynamics. When an ex comes back, it can trigger old patterns. You might feel a pull towards the familiarity, even if it was unhealthy. It's a comfort zone, right? For me, I had to recognize that going back would mean repeating a cycle where my worth wasn't truly appreciated. My peace of mind is too valuable to compromise for a 'renewed relationship' that's built on a foundation of past disrespect and broken trust. If they couldn't appreciate me then, what guarantee do I have now? The 'it was f*** me back then' feeling is real, and it's hard to shake. It’s crucial to understand your own attachment style and how it might influence your desire to return to an old comfort, even if it wasn't good for you. So, what do you do when your ex tries to come back? First, check in with yourself. Has anything truly changed? Not just their words, but their actions? In my case, I knew deep down that the betrayal ('you explored other options') was too deep. I had to stand on my decision. The lyrics say it best: 'you made a bad decision you gonna stand on it.' That's not just for them; it's for me too. I'm standing on my decision to value myself. It's tempting to think about a 'renewed relationship,' especially if you're feeling lonely or miss the good times. But a truly healthy renewed relationship requires genuine remorse, consistent effort, and a complete overhaul of the behaviors that led to the breakup. If they're just HITTING MY PHONE because they're lonely or realized they made a mistake, without doing the hard work on themselves, then it's a hard NO from me. I've learned that 'it ain't that many real ones left' who will consistently choose you, and if someone didn't choose you the first time, you owe it to yourself to be skeptical. Learning to say NO and block them, as I did, is an act of self-love. It's about protecting your peace and honoring your journey. Don't let guilt or nostalgia drag you back into a situation that no longer serves you. You deserve someone who chooses you, not someone who comes back when other options run out. So, if your ex is trying to come back, remember your worth and don't be afraid to pull the plug, just like I did when I said 'GOODBYE' and blocked ALL calls. This isn't about being wrong; it's about being strong.