Mom hot take: co sleeping isn’t always ideal..

for some families, co sleeping is perfect! but sometimes we don’t realize we can be putting stains on our marriages/ relationships.

• disruptive sleep

babies are naturally noisy, wiggly sleepers. parents often end up with way less rest, which can build resentment. you’re tired, cranky, needing help… especially if you’re first time parents, fighting during the newborn stage can occur.

• safety concerns

always worrying about rolling over, blankets, or space makes sleep even lighter and more stressful. which will lead to sleepless nights and horrible attitudes.

• intimacy strain

couples may feel like their room/ bed, is no longer their own, which can distance them emotionally and physically. and this mainly will target men.

• different parenting styles

if one parent is all for co-sleeping and the other hates it, the tension can chip away at the relationship. because you already have built up anger from this argument, it can lead to many more. especially if you cannot come to an agreement.

• harder transitions later

some kids struggle to move to their own bed, making the “short-term solution” a long-term problem. MANY families still have their children sleeping with them at older ages, some i personally know of. frustration can occur and lead to a problem not only for the child but for the marriage/ relationship.

for some families, co-sleeping is cozy and bonding! it’s beyond ideal for them. and sometimes it works out. but as for others, it can become a huge burnout, and can possibly put a dent in your relationship.

#momhottakes #lemon8challenge #cosleepinglifestyle #sleepingtoddler #newborn

2025/9/11 Edited to

... Read moreCo-sleeping has been a popular parenting approach for many, offering closeness and convenience during those demanding early months. However, while some families thrive with this practice, it’s important to recognize the potential downsides that can strain both parents and relationships. One common issue is the disruptive sleep patterns babies bring. Infants naturally shift, make noises, and wake frequently, which can drastically reduce parents’ rest. Chronic sleep deprivation often leads to frustration and tension between partners, making the postpartum period especially challenging. This aligns with the observation that "babies are naturally noisy, wiggly sleepers," which can unintentionally create a buildup of resentment. Safety concerns are another crucial factor. Parents often find themselves anxious about accidentally rolling over on their child or worrying about suffocation hazards from blankets and pillows in shared beds. This heightened vigilance can cause lighter, more restless sleep and increase parental stress levels. Intimacy takes an unspoken hit when a child shares the bed. Couples may feel a loss of privacy and connection, which can lead to emotional and physical distance. Research and parental accounts suggest that men may feel this more acutely, adding a unique dynamic to the relationship challenges that come with co-sleeping. Disagreements about co-sleeping between parents are also common. When one parent favors this practice and the other opposes it, tension and unresolved conflict can accumulate. Compromising on co-sleeping arrangements is essential to prevent anger from spilling over into other areas of the relationship. Lastly, the transition away from co-sleeping can be exceptionally difficult when children become attached to sleeping beside their parents. Some families report that what started as a brief solution extends into years, causing ongoing frustration that affects not just the child’s independence but also marital satisfaction. Despite these challenges, co-sleeping is deeply bonding for many families and can provide comfort and security for infants. The key is to evaluate what works best for individual family dynamics while considering the impacts on sleep quality, safety, intimacy, and parental unity. Open communication, setting boundaries, and gradual adjustments can help balance co-sleeping benefits with its possible drawbacks, preserving both marital health and child wellbeing.

15 comments

Zoe Jackson's images
Zoe Jackson

Me personally I would never do it, but I won't judge anyone who chooses to do it

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Christina💙SAHM's images
Christina💙SAHM

I’m so sorry this didn’t work for you! For us in my home, it actually worked out great! Being EBF we all slept better. And hubby and I have grown closer, we get creative and spend time with one another. It’s definitely not for everyone!!

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