MOM HOT TAKE: no to participation awards.
growing up, we never had this and as a mom, it kinda irritates me 🤷🏽♀️
i don’t give my kids awards for something they didn’t earn. that’s like being involved in a group project, and not even helping. yet you’re still getting praise.
when kids get rewarded no matter what, they start believing confidence comes from approval, not from effort. REAL confidence is built when a child struggles, improves, and achieves. If everyone wins, there’s no sense of accomplishment, just entitlement.
if kids never face losing, they never learn to bounce back. real confidence grows when they fail, regroup, and try again. let’s stop giving them trophies and awards JUST because we want everyone to feel included. let’s start teaching them EARNED pride versus handed pride.
Participation trophies and awards have become a common practice in many schools and extracurricular activities, but it’s important to understand why they might do more harm than good for children’s development. The truth is, handing out awards just for showing up or trying can unintentionally foster a sense of entitlement rather than genuine pride in accomplishments. Kids need to experience both success and failure in order to build resilience and real self-confidence. When children receive praise only for participation, they may begin to associate their self-worth with external approval instead of the effort and growth they demonstrate. This can lead to a fragile confidence that crumbles when faced with real challenges. Moreover, not facing the reality of losing or underperforming steals important life lessons about perseverance and coping with setbacks. When children struggle, regroup, and try again, they learn that failure is a natural part of growth and not something to be feared. This process encourages them to develop problem-solving skills and emotional strength that will benefit them throughout their lives. It’s vital to differentiate between encouragement and unwarranted reward. Encouragement involves supporting children through challenges and acknowledging improvements without necessarily giving trophies or awards for minimal achievements. Celebrating real milestones and hard-earned success motivates kids to set goals and work diligently toward them. The mom’s perspective in this article highlights a frustration shared by many parents who want their children to appreciate the value of hard work and responsibility. Simply “being there” or “trying” without meaningful contribution shouldn’t always warrant recognition. Instead, teaching kids to earn their pride helps develop a mindset where rewards are a result of genuine achievement. In summary, avoiding participation awards doesn’t mean withholding all praise—it means focusing on meaningful feedback and fostering internal motivation. By encouraging kids to embrace challenges and learn from failures, parents can help build confident, capable individuals who understand that true success comes from effort and growth, not handed-out trophies.
Agreed! I don’t think they build any real confidence in children and is just a way to keep kids from feeling left out. But not getting a ribbon or metal will only motivate kids to try harder next time!