POV you’re my hg and I left you a voice note pt 1
Hey girl, I was just calling cause I thought of something.
In relationships, it really depends on the man. He will be a complete monster with you, and everything the next woman needs.
But my thing is. I saw my ex interacting with his girlfriend/BM. (I didn’t have a choice, I was helping them with a car problem) but he was not the Prince Charming we think the guy is being when he’s not with us, and he’s just giving her the world he never gave me, blah blah blah. NOOOOO he’s being just as ahiity, and mean, and degrading as he was when he was with me BUT TO HER. You feel me?
And that made me look at things differently. Not of him. But of her. Because I saw the woman I used to be. And it made me sad. Like “wow. I used to accept love just like that.” I could see in that woman’s eyes that she was hurt and tired, but fighting for her relationship.
Let me tell you I don’t have another fight in me for a danm relationship. Over a man? Please 😂 But I was you sis. Wanting to do everything I could to make this family work and to keep their father in their lives. Look, the saying literally goes, “if he wanted to he would.”
If he wanted to stay in your child(ren) lives he would have….. he still would be making you feel bad in the process through.
He could pay all the bills and be the provider. hes still going to make you feel guilty about it.
See, ive lived both lives! Yes he stayed, but he still treated me like shyt.
So here’s my advice. You might as well be alone and happy if it means not having to feel uncomfortable in your own skin every day. Being with the wrong man will make your skin crawl. Make you feel gross! EeeYUCK! 🤢🤢
Because your spirit knows
And Your heart knows
And your mind knows
THAT THIS ISNT ENOUGH FOR ME!
…
But your legs won’t even move.
So you stay. I’ve been there girl..
And that’s exactly what I told her. And that’s why he blocked me and stopped paying his child support (oops) 🫢
Because I could help her see her worth and she wouldn’t even want dude anymore. So he had to cut that off instantly! 😂 I don’t blame him.
Anyway, call me back girl! 😘😅
#blackrelationships #softlifeenergy #embracevulnerability #bestfriends #pov
Navigating through toxic relationships can be one of the hardest challenges many face, especially when it comes to recognizing patterns of abuse and emotional harm. The story shared reflects an authentic experience many women relate to: seeing a partner behave abusively not just with them but with others as well. This realization often shifts perspectives, allowing us to see past the illusions and recognize that the problem lies not in ourselves but in the partner’s consistent behavior. It’s important to remember that men — or any partner — who are controlling, degrading, or manipulative do this regardless of who they are with. This cyclical abuse doesn’t change simply because the relationship changes. In fact, witnessing such behavior towards another woman can help you identify warning signs you may have previously ignored or justified. The phrase, “if he wanted to he would,” resonates deeply here. It’s a reminder that genuine care and commitment are demonstrated through consistent effort and respect. Actions like staying involved in children’s lives or providing financially can be overshadowed by emotional manipulation, which often leaves lasting scars. One empowering takeaway is valuing your own worth above the chaos a toxic relationship brings. Choosing to be alone and happy rather than in a harmful partnership generally leads to better self-esteem, mental health, and overall quality of life. Your spirit, heart, and mind inherently know when something isn’t enough – even if fear or comfort zones paralyze you from leaving. Many feel trapped as the mind rationalizes staying for family or hope for change, but understanding that emotional abuse affects your self-esteem and well-being is crucial. It’s okay not to fight another battle that only drains you. Recognizing this truth is the first step toward healing. Support systems, whether friends, therapists, or communities that embrace vulnerability, play a huge role. Sharing your experience, like the original voice note, helps others to see they are not alone and encourages them to prioritize self-care. Ultimately, walking away from a toxic relationship isn’t just about rejecting the partner; it’s about embracing self-love and creating a safe, fulfilling life where you don’t feel degraded or gagged emotionally. The courage to break free often leads to rediscovering yourself, healing past wounds, and opening doors to healthier, more respectful connections in the future.