Practical mental wellness insights from a trauma survivor for fellow survivors. We tend to focus on the “why that happened?!”, “why that person behaved like that?!”, or “why did I do that?!”… because we need to protect ourselves from future harm. Been there, done that, and, it didn't work. Obsessing over the “why” is not really helpful for healing—if anything, it may make things even worse. Creating felt safety in real life instead. Focus on the present, create a predictable routine, change lifestyle… small repeated actions everyday may be more beneficial.
Source: Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma.
*Note: This content is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice.
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... Read moreAs someone who has navigated the complexities of trauma recovery, I found that shifting my focus from endlessly questioning "why" my trauma happened to grounding myself in the present was life-changing. The nervous system can stay trapped in survival mode if we replay traumatic events mentally, which only reinforces stress responses rather than promotes healing.
Instead, I developed small, consistent daily routines that created predictability and safety for my body and mind—such as regular sleep schedules, mindfulness meditation, and gentle movement exercises. These helped me feel more in control and less overwhelmed. Somatic practices, like shaking out tension from my hands and body, further supported the release of stored trauma and stress, calming my nervous system over time.
I also found validation and new perspectives through books like Bessel van der Kolk's "The Body Keeps the Score," which highlights the importance of addressing trauma beyond intellectual understanding. Healing comes from transforming how our body and brain respond to triggers.
For those on a similar journey, I encourage focusing on what you can do daily to create safety and stability in your environment and body. It’s not about having all the answers but cultivating a sense of peace in the present moment. Remember, small, repeated actions can profoundly influence recovery and wellness.