Next part of our position
Our Witch School Canada Position:
A note to the men in our community
Many of you have seen the recent wave of reporting about wealthy and powerful men, and the sexual exploitation that was enabled by money, access, status, and silence. For women, young women, and non-binary peoples. Some of these details are hard to hold in the mind, let alone the body.
WitchSchool wants to be clear about two things at the same time.
First: if you’re a man reading this and thinking, “That’s not me,” we believe you. Many and most men in our community are decent and caring people.
Second: in moments like this, women, femmes, and many non-binary people can feel the familiar tightening. The “of course.” The anger. The grief. The old memories. The tyranny of the past doings. Even if we’ve never met 'those' men, the pattern is recognizable. It touches lived experience.
So this is not a post about internet spectacle. It’s a request for real, grounded support from you.
To the good men: please don’t bypass this moment.
Not with jokes. Not with silences. Not in your circles. Not at your dinner tables with your daughters, mothers, sisters, wives. & please don't use “not all men” as the first reflex -not at this time in our history. We already know “not all men.” What we need is: moral clarity out loud, say it outloud to them, and have steady behaviours / predictable patterns right about now.
Here are practical things that help:
1) Say the simple sentence
“I saw the reporting. It’s horrifying. I’m sorry this is in the air again. How are you doing?”
That sentence signals safety more than you might realize.
2) Speak to other men
Quietly, directly, in your actual life. Group chats, work, family dinners, the casual spaces.
When someone minimizes, deflects, mocks, or turns it into gossip, say:
“No. We’re not doing that.”
“That’s not funny.”
“Stop defending men with power.”
“Consent is basic.”
"Its all over the news and it scary -lets not just bypass it"
3) Be specific about what you will not tolerate
Sexist jokes. “She’s asking for it.” "They all just get dressed up, get drunk and go home with someone". Compliments that are really pressure ' youre acting irrational' 'smile or be more friendly' . Fixation on the very young people. Disrespect toward service workers. Homophobia. Transphobia.
Draw a line. Hold it. Be that guy.
4) Build trust at home through daily life
A public stance means little if private life stays unchanged. Share mental load. Handle what needs handling without being asked. Notice what makes the home feel safe or unsafe. Repair quickly when you mess up. Keep your word.
We are not interested in shaming men. We are interested in ending the conditions that allow harm to repeat.
If you’re a man reading this: thank you for staying with it. If you want to know what to do, start small and real: speak clearly, speak to other men, and be steady in your closest relationships.
That is what repair can look like.
Reflecting on recent discussions about sexual exploitation involving men of wealth and power, it’s clear that addressing these issues requires ongoing, tangible efforts from everyone, especially men who want to be allies in creating safer communities. From my personal experience, I found that the most impactful change begins by acknowledging the harm and openly engaging in conversations about it. Sincerity in small gestures, like asking "How are you doing?" after hearing troubling news, can make people feel supported and less isolated. It demonstrates awareness and compassion, which builds trust over time. I’ve also noticed that calling out dismissive behavior among men—such as sexist jokes or minimizing serious issues—helps set a standard for what is acceptable in our social circles. It often takes courage but leads to a meaningful shift in group dynamics. Sharing responsibilities at home and ensuring emotional safety is another pivotal step. When I actively participate in mental load sharing and respond sensitively to those around me, it creates a more nurturing environment. This reduces stress and models the respect we want to extend into the wider world. This approach aligns with the Witch School Canada position encouraging men to move beyond silence or defensiveness. Instead, it calls for moral clarity and steady, consistent behavior both publicly and privately. Engaging in these practices contributes to dismantling the conditions that have allowed harm to persist, fostering real repair and progress in our communities.
