When I accidentally did this,

Hello, I'm interested in conversation skills lately, because now I think many people, including me, are ready to be speakers 🗣️, but we may lack the skills to be listeners (unconsciously), so that conversation is not a good conversation.

📋, because in my view, I think that the skill of listening to the interlocutor is very necessary to socialize or get to know someone, but if each person speaks, it can make the relationship not as strong as it should be, do not impress or create unease during the conversation.

📚 Today I'm going to summarize a few things that I think we shouldn't do in a conversation from an article that I've read and understood in order to improve ourselves at the same time. 😊

❌ Don't be afraid of silence. ❌

When someone is talking or telling us something, when my brain immediately comes up with the answer, maybe in the middle of a sentence, what to answer. To use this word to answer, to comfort me with this word, it turns out that I may not concentrate on the sentence after this, which today I understand is the wrong approach.

In the book, speaking and listening use the same part of the brain 🧠, so if we listen to someone talking and in the meantime think about the answer, our ability to listen is reduced ⬇️, so we don't really understand what they want to communicate. All we have to do is control patience and "listen to learn, not to answer." ✅ This means that we have to wait for the other person to finish talking and then take a break to answer. (Think before answering) For example, if a friend tells me a story, I will listen to it until the end. If he asks a comment or advice, I will propose. But if not, I will ask back. In the material he told him to expand it, or to repeat that I understood what my friend said, and sometimes his friend didn't need advice. 😅

❌ Don't intimidate other people's experiences. ❌

For example, if our friends tell us that we are having problems in our lives, we must not immediately answer: "We understand because we have problems in our lives as well." (Take your own example) I confessed that I used to, because I thought that having a common experience or sharing a story would make us feel more understanding, but not really.

The book says that we do this is to bring the focus of the conversation back to ourselves, because what the media says is that "the problem of friends is not interesting to us, we will tell you about our problems that are more interesting," which is to take over the story and do not honor the other person.

In the book, it suggests that if we want to make a connection with a common experience, let's listen to our friend's experience first, ask about his story, or admire him, and then tell our own story.

After reading these topics, I realized that listening is not just about hearing what the interlocutor says, but a lot of details that we may not know before, some of which are conversation etiquette.

Hopefully, the content I share today may help us to impress interlocutors who, in addition to friends, can be other people and make us better listeners. There is something good to share. 💖

Anyone with other opinions can share. 🙏🏻

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