It was worse.
Fitness: I’ve struggled with disordered eating since I was… maybe thirteen. I was called a string bean as a kid and even when puberty hit, I was a bit of a late bloomer. My mom and my sister struggled with weight but I never noticed they were “bigger” I just thought they were… older? Then one day I was microwaving a potato and my mom said “Don’t eat too many potatoes or you’ll end up big like your sister.” I know a combination of other things led to my struggle with food (my dad getting re-married the summer before I started high school and moving away, peer/societal pressure, emotional abuse, etc), but that somehow sticks out to me as the catalyst. It changed my perception of food and caused me question each bite. I played sports in middle and high school and my thighs became muscular, but I thought they were too big. My arms were toned but I thought they were “manly.” I wanted a waif body type but I’m athletically built. It was, and still is, a constant battle between what I think I should look like and what I’m capable of looking like.
I do know I want to feel healthy and strong and comfortable in my skin and that starts with eating right and being active, consistently. But damn consistency is hard.
Environment: I’m trying to switch between big spaces and small spaces so I don’t burn out. Enter: my side of the bathroom counter. I didn’t picture my husband’s side because it’s immaculate and we don’t need to compare 😅 I try to make systems and uphold systems but my overconsumption and lack of consistency leads to piles. Piles everywhere. I added a trash bin under the sink so I’d stop leaving cotton pads and plastic wrappers on the counter but once it filled up I didn’t take it out. So now the counter is full of junk again. I buy beauty items on whims and if I don’t like it, instead of tossing it “I might use it one day” and it ends up in a pile. Until there’s nowhere to put anything and the systems fall apart. It’s so frustrating! The counter was much, much worse, like overflowing to my husband’s side… but I cleared it off maybe a week ago and we’re already back to this. I need start making thoughtful purchase and work on my impulse buys because this is not working.
#ODAAT #bodytransformation #embracevulnerability #growthjourney #lifetransformation #BetterMe #onedayatatime
Struggling with disordered eating is a challenge many face, often stemming from emotional, social, or familial pressures. People commonly experience challenges related to body image and eating habits during puberty and beyond. The societal standards of beauty can significantly impact self-perception, leading to unhealthy relationships with food. It's essential to cultivate a sense of self-worth that isn't tied to appearance. Moreover, the environment plays a vital role in maintaining consistency. Organizing living spaces and making thoughtful purchases can help mitigate clutter and promote a more positive mindset. Establishing small, achievable goals aids in developing healthier habits and sustaining motivation. It's important to seek community support when navigating these challenges, as sharing experiences can foster resilience and provide a sense of belonging. Resources such as therapy or support groups can also offer guidance and strategies for overcoming disordered eating.