Unhelpful things said to me while going through one of the most difficult life experiences...

Infertility isn't a real health condition.

Why don't you just get a surrogate or adopt?

Just be positive.

It will happen when you least expect it.

Just stop thinking about it.

IVF is selfish.

At least you can try again. (And: At least it was early).

Maybe it's not meant to be.

When all I really needed was someone to listen and be there...

To those supporting a loved one struggling with infertility or loss, please know that these comments are hurtful. We don't need magic words to fix what we're feeling. We just want to feel seen, heard, and less alone.

Have you heard any of these comments?

#ttccommunity #infertilitystruggles #fertilityjourney #ivfjourney #ivfwarrior

2025/11/6 Edited to

... Read moreInfertility is often misunderstood, and the struggle can be emotionally draining, especially when those affected hear unhelpful comments such as "Infertility isn't a real health condition" or "Just be positive." These phrases, while sometimes well-meaning, can invalidate the experience and pain that individuals or couples go through. It’s important to acknowledge that infertility is indeed a medical condition recognized by major health organizations worldwide. Treatments like IVF (In Vitro Fertilization), hormonal therapies, and sometimes surrogacy or adoption are some pathways people pursue. However, each path comes with its own emotional and physical challenges that require support rather than judgment. A common misconception is the suggestion to "just get a surrogate or adopt," which overlooks the complexity of personal desires, financial costs, legal issues, and emotional readiness. Others may say "IVF is selfish," reflecting a stigma that can make patients feel isolated or misunderstood. Those supporting loved ones facing infertility or pregnancy loss need to focus on empathy. Sometimes the best support is simply listening, acknowledging the pain without trying to fix it or offer unsolicited advice. Statements like "It will happen when you least expect it" or "Maybe it’s not meant to be" can unintentionally suggest dismissal of someone’s hopes and efforts. Having knowledge about the IVF process can also foster understanding and compassion toward those undergoing treatments. IVF involves hormonal stimulation, multiple clinic visits, injections (such as Gonal F, Menopur, Luveris), embryo culturing and transfers, and often supplemental hormone treatments like progesterone suppositories. These steps can be physically taxing and emotionally straining, requiring patience and resilience. By avoiding dismissive phrases and instead providing genuine presence, encouragement, and acceptance, friends and family can help reduce the loneliness and emotional burden faced by people navigating infertility. Recognizing infertility as a serious health condition and responding with sensitivity can make a crucial difference in the healing journey. Ultimately, fostering open conversations and raising awareness within communities—such as through #ttccommunity, #infertilitystruggles, and #fertilityjourney forums—builds a network of support and understanding that many desperately need during these tough times.

Related posts

Study tips used as a AP student
#studytips #lemon8challenge #lemon8creator #Lemon8 #viral Can be used for everyone❤️ 1) good notes now! pretty notes later! It’s best to focus more on taking good notes then making it pretty, I struggled since I focused more on pretty notes than actual good notes and they were u
Andy!!!

Andy!!!

6276 likes

keep track of these things to make college easier
If you want to be less stressed in college i HIGHLY recommend keeping track of these specific things: Make a 4 Year Plan: In college you’ll have a counselor/advisor that is there to help you ensure that you’ll be graduating on time and have met all the class requirements… unfortunately i’ve hear
Alexis

Alexis

838 likes

How to reduce stress! The insightful guide ✨🚨🌟🌸
6 Coping Styles to Help You Navigate Life’s Challenges When stress hits or emotions run high, having a toolbox of coping skills can make all the difference. Here are six powerful styles of coping to help you regain control and find balance: 1️⃣ Distraction👍Pros : Shift your focus temporarily
Draven Royce

Draven Royce

32 likes

A flat lay shows a slice of cake, coffee, and forks on a wooden table, with the text overlay "how to have A HEALTHIER DIET" as the article's title.
A vibrant salad with lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, chickpeas, and tortilla chips is shown, illustrating tips on portion control and using smaller plates to avoid overeating.
A large bowl of Vietnamese vermicelli noodles with grilled meat, spring rolls, and vegetables highlights the importance of balance in main meals, including protein, carbs, and healthy fats.
nutrition & healthy eating tips 🥗
diets can be one of the most harmful things to your health if you don't diet correctly! ❌ purely "restricting your intake" is unhelpful. i've also tried "eating less", and it's just really difficult. the best thing to do is trick your mind into thinking you're eat
clarissa ♥

clarissa ♥

8 likes

How to set healthy boundaries in life 💫
I used to think boundaries meant pushing people away. Now I see them as a way to protect my peace, energy, and what matters most. With Lifelight, I feel supported in making those choices every day. 🧘‍♀️ Clear Mental Space I’ve started stepping away from things that drain me—endless scrolling, u
Chloe💕

Chloe💕

62 likes

A title slide with '5 ChatGPT Prompts That Can Help You Work Through Your Mental Health' in black text on a white background. It states, 'Your Mental Health Matters- Even If You Can't Afford Therapy.' and has a 'Swipe to learn' button and an orange heart.
An orange slide titled '1. For Understanding What's Really Going On'. It provides a ChatGPT prompt for exploring underlying issues, its purpose to build self-awareness, and a tip to answer honestly. A 'next page' arrow is visible.
An orange slide titled '2. For Emotional Regulation and Coping'. It presents a ChatGPT prompt for managing emotions with coping strategies, its purpose to mimic CBT/DBT, and a tip to ask ChatGPT to pause for interaction.
5 ChatGPT Prompts to Support Your Mental Health 💫
Stop scrolling. Start reflecting. Use these 5 ChatGPT prompts to explore your thoughts, manage emotions, and take small steps toward mental clarity and self-compassion. Your mental health matters. You matter. #mentalhealthawareness #healing #unfiltered #therapy #love
Morgan Jones

Morgan Jones

243 likes

Sometimes trauma doesn’t feel like trauma. It feels like control. Like logic. Like “I’m just not ready to go there.” My therapist once said something to me that hit hard: Deflection and suppression often feel good in the moment. They give us relief. They let us breathe. But just like sou
Laurel

Laurel

34 likes

Tips for New Grad Nurses ✨
As a new grad nurse, I felt like I was drowning in the constant hustle, trying to keep up with everything. Looking back, there are a few key things I wish I knew that would have made my transition smoother. If you’re a new grad or about to start, here are some tips that might just save you some str
syd✨🌷

syd✨🌷

23 likes

Cognitive Reframing 🩵🧠🩵
✨🎀🧠🎀✨Cognitive reframing is a valuable technique to manage unhelpful thinking styles by altering the way you perceive events, situations, or emotions. Here's how you can apply cognitive reframing to the ten common unhelpful thinking styles: 1. All-or-nothing thinking: Reframe situations to s
Dr. Velmi, PsyD

Dr. Velmi, PsyD

42 likes

How I Deal With Depression 🥲
I have had a hard time in the past with depression. I really hit a really hard time back in 2020 while C-19 because of the pandemic my mental health took a toll on me. I still go through my depression from time to time. But I make sure to do these things to help me get through it. Dealing with
Joy 📚

Joy 📚

453 likes

A book page titled "Habits That Make A Champion" displays text highlighted in yellow about embracing discomfort, discipline, and overcoming comfort zones. A pink arrow points to the highlighted section, emphasizing the message that "You always win in the mind first." Lemon8 branding is visible at the bottom.
Habits that make a champion 🤎🤍
#Lemon8 #lemon8bookclub #lemon8book #unaesthetic
🌹ylaisa sanz 🌹

🌹ylaisa sanz 🌹

572 likes

Steal My Note Strategies for Exam Success 👩‍🎓 📝
Knowing how to take good notes that are perfect for you, is a GAME CHANGER when it comes to exams! Having reliable, organized notes can mean the different between success and failure. I would highly recommend investing in some good pens and highlighters for note taking! It’s important that your
Stella Studies

Stella Studies

315 likes

Replying to @Xoxo lmk if this was completely unhelpful lol and I’ll make a better one💀 #hairinspo #hairhack #beadsinhair #summerhairstyles
Megan Dance

Megan Dance

1085 likes

Beach day
Preparing a perfect beach day with unhelpful weather #beachday #beach #beachvibes
Cherry

Cherry

31 likes

15 things to let go of in 2024
✨️15 THINGS TOLET GO OF IN 2024✨️ STAYING STUCK ON AUTOPILOT VALUES YOU DIDN'T CHOOSE SELF-SABOTAGING BEHAVIORS LACKING A SUPPORT SYSTEM FEAR OF BEING DISLIKED ENDLESS COMPARISON TO OTHERS ALL-OR-NOTHING THINKING REPEATED "IF ONLY'S" SUPPOSED "MAGIC SOLUTIONS" METR
soulfulmanifest

soulfulmanifest

44 likes

I’ll help❤️
Does anyone else’s dogs help in the most unhelpful way😅❤️ #dogsoflemon8 #dog #helping #cute
Maynii

Maynii

9 likes

An infographic titled '10 Unhelpful Thinking Styles' features two stylized brain illustrations. It lists and defines ten cognitive distortions, such as All-or-nothing thinking and Catastrophizing, against a vibrant gradient background. The image includes 'WWW.THEPSYCHPOD.COM' and '@thepsychpod'.
Top 10 Unhelpful Thinking Styles 👁️🧠👁️
✨💭🧠💭✨10 Most Common Unhelpful Thinking Styles to look out for: 1. All-or-nothing thinking: Seeing things in black and white, without considering any middle ground. 2. Overgeneralization: Drawing broad conclusions based on limited evidence or a single incident. 3. Filtering: Focusing only o
Dr. Velmi, PsyD

Dr. Velmi, PsyD

185 likes

Tips On Coping With Anxiety 😫 🥲
Managing anxiety often involves a combination of techniques to help ease tension and promote relaxation. Here are some strategies that may help: 1. Practice Deep Breathing Deep, controlled breathing can help activate the body’s relaxation response. Try inhaling slowly for a count of fo
Joy 📚

Joy 📚

820 likes

A Message From Your Federal Overlords
In this helpful and reassuring public address, your federal overlords explain how to stay calm, compliant, and emotionally manageable while the same things keep happening. You’ll learn why what you saw isn’t what you saw, why your anger is the real problem, and how accountability works best when no
Fight Oligarchy

Fight Oligarchy

59 likes

This image lists 14 cognitive distortions, including All-or-Nothing Thinking, Overgeneralisation, and Mental Filter. It explains these are thinking patterns that can affect mood, behavior, and self-esteem, and are often addressed in counseling services.
Counseling in Santa Maria
Ana Champagne, LMFT is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California who provides counseling services for individuals, couples, families, and children in the Central Coast area, particularly Orcutt and Santa Maria. 805 720 4533
orcutt.counseling

orcutt.counseling

8 likes

A black background with white and purple text stating, "THIS EXACT AI PROMPT MAKES CHATGPT FINALLY GIVE CLEAR, ACCURATE, AND TO-THE-POINT ANSWERS." A white arrow points down to text that says, "Copy and Paste it Into ChatGPT." The Lemon8 logo and @promptly.daily handle are at the bottom.
A black background displays the "Absolute Mode" system instruction for ChatGPT. It lists rules like eliminating filler, assuming high-perception, prioritizing blunt phrasing, and suppressing emotional softening, aiming to restore independent thinking. The Lemon8 logo and @promptly.daily handle are at the bottom.
A dark purple background with white text reads, "Follow For Daily Prompts, Tools and AI News." Below are social media interaction icons (like, comment, save, share) and a smartphone displaying a circular, starburst-like loading animation with a 'P' in the center. The Lemon8 logo and @promptly.daily handle are at the bottom.
This Al Prompt Makes ChatGPT Give Better Answers
Tired of getting long winded, unhelpful responses from ChatGPT? I found a prompt that changes everything. It's designed to give you clear, accurate, and direct answers every single time. Here's the "Absolute Mode" prompt to copy and paste. Get straight to the point and get the infor
Promptly Daily ✪

Promptly Daily ✪

74 likes

life is too short to waste energy on nonsense.
#calm #staycalm #mood #selfimprovement #selfgrowth
ClaraCocoa

ClaraCocoa

2080 likes

Confessions of a NICU mama
#lemon8diarychallenge #nicumom #parenting 1. Having a baby at 35 weeks pregnant was the most traumatic thing I have ever been through, even though labor was easy, the thought that my body decided it was time kills me in the inside. 2. Leaving my baby everyday to take care of my kids at ho
Lex

Lex

19 likes

See more